It is New Year's Eve and Cameron is on-call tonight--this means he is gone all night. But, he may get to deliver the first baby of the New Year! So, I am sitting alone, all the kiddos are in bed and I am blogging and thinking back on this past year. I am amazed at how many changes our family went through:
Jan.--we accepted the referral for Jerome and Ruth, Anna's birthday
Feb.--found out we were expecting baby #5 (0r #7--depends how you look at it)
March--Huge garage sale to raise $$ for adoption, found a house to buy
April--put house on the market and sold it in 10 days, Cameron's birthday
May--packed and packed, found out we were having our 4th girl!
June--Cameron graduated from residency, we moved into our new home
July--went to the beach, Cam started new job
August--Katria and Jonas' birthdays, adoption finalized
Sept.--Elyse's birthday, Jerome's passport issued
Oct.--Haven born, my birthday, Ruthie's passport issued
Nov.--Cameron goes to Liberia and comes home without kids
Dec.--Jerome and Ruth home!!
What a year! I was also thinking back to all the books I have read this year. Those who know me well know that I am always in the middle of a book. I tend to read A LOT when I am pregnant. I don't know why. Maybe it is "nesting" for my brain?? I compiled a list of what I have read this past year so that maybe you can get an idea for a good read. However, if you are going to read through the list, there is a condition! You MUST leave me your book recommendation! I really am terrible about choosing books. I have to have a recommendation! So, here is my list:
There is no Me Without You--great book. About Ethiopia and the Aids crisis and adoption. I read it in one weekend--the weekend I had horrible morning sickness and couldn't get off the couch!
Les Miserables--LONG, (1500 pages long) but a great read. It is amazing how the story is woven together--Oh, and I did skip, I mean skim, a few hundred pages that were less than exciting. You will know what I mean if you have read the book.
Tramp for the Lord--Corrie Ten Boom's sequel to The Hiding Place. Such a good book--so inspiring.
David Copperfield--so good! Once I got into it, I couldn't put it down. I am a HUGE classics fan. I am also a fan of Dickens.
Tears of the Rain--a autobiographical account of a missionary's stay in Liberia. A MUST read to those who are adopting from Liberia.
The Hawk and the Dove--very good--about Monks. fiction. Very interesting and different.
Lost Boy No More: A True Story of Survival and Salvation--This book was about the lost boys of Sudan. It was good in parts and dragged in others.
Joni--Joni Eareckson Tada's autobiography--great book by an extraordinary woman of faith.
Ruth, A Portrait: The Story of Ruth Bell Graham--her biography written by Patricia Cornwell--very good.
The Exodus--by Leon Uris. An amazing historical account of what happened to the Jews post WW II. The history is woven into an unforgettable story of fiction.
Keeping our Children's Hearts--by the Maxwells. A must read for any parents. Changed my perspective on parenting.
Deadline, Dominion and Deception by Randy Alcorn--so good--Christian fiction that makes you think. Not fluff, in my opinion.
The Lights of Tenth Street by Shuanti Feldhahn. Great Christian book--fiction.
The Veritas Conflict also by Shanti Fledhahn. Another great book. Quick read. This book and the previous one are the kind of books that you can't put down. You know what I mean. The kind you sneak into the bathroom during the day to get away from the kids so you can steal a few pages. Then, when they knock and ask what you are doing, you pretend you are using the bathroom! Don't you do that, too??
A Long Way Gone: Memoirs of a Boy Soldier--hard to read in that the content was so disturbing, but a must read for those adopting from Liberia. It is about the war in Sierra Leone and a child soldier's experience. Makes me shudder to remember it and to think of my Jerome.
The Family Nobody Wanted--I first read this as a child and it inspired me to adopt. I re-read it again this year and I still loved it and it still inspired me!
Left To Tell: Discovering God Amidst the Rwandan Holocaust--another hard read in the content, but worth it nonetheless. However, it was endorsed by a man who isn't a Christian, but kind of creepy, so it left a bad taste in my mouth.
The Cross-Centered Life--by CJ Mahaney. A small book, but a quick read. Very worth it! Puts your focus on Christ.
Born in Our Hearts: Stories of Adoption--I didn't really care for this book. Sorry.
Heaven's Wager--by Ted Dekker. It was okay. Not one of my favorites by him.
In My Father's House--another book about Corrie Ten Boom and her early years. I can't get enough of her! Her faith has strengthened mine!
The Costly Call II--the sequel to the first book entitled The Costly Call--true stories about Muslims coming to Christ and being persecuted for their faith.
Lady Jane Grey--the biography about Jane Grey--Queen of England for 12 days (??) and a Christian. Fascinating account. I never learned about this in history class.
Fields of the Fatherless--it was okay.
Currently reading: The Shack--so far so good. I got this one for Christmas from my mom, another reader. Spiritual Disciplines for the Christian Life--Okay, I have been reading this one for awhile, but I will finish it! It is good, but not a quick read. You have to let the information soak in slowly. My Cousin, Rachel--by Daphne DuMaurier. If you haven't read anything by her, you really should. Start with Rebecca. This was made into a movie by Alfred Hitchcock. Very good.
So . . . That is my list of good reads from 2007. Something tells me that my list won't be quite as long this year with 7 kids! I LOVE getting book recommendations, so if you have one, esp. a good one about adoption, but ANY good book--PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE leave it in the comments.
Thank you!
In Christ, Laura
Monday, December 31, 2007
Adjusting
I know many of you are wondering how we are adjusting--how Jerome and Ruth are adjusting, how our biological children are adjusting and how Cameron and I are adjusting to having 7 kids. Some of you have called and some of you, I am guessing, want to call but don't want to interrupt--to ask us how it is going.
I will be transparent here and say that it hasn't been easy. When is adjustment easy? I have had a hard time adjusting each time I had a new baby and this, in some ways, is no different. We knew it was going to be a big change--to adopt 2 children from a third-world country in Africa and accept them into our family as our own--but that doesn't make it easier. Expecting it to be difficult doesn't lessen the degree of difficulty. There have been things that we expected that haven't happened--such as food hoarding and bed-wetting and waking up at night. But, there have been other discipline issues that I did not expect. I have been stretched these past few days with Cameron back at work and all of my family gone. But, I have been forced to rely on God and that is ALWAYS a good place to be, no matter what situation we find ourselves in. It is ironic to me now that I thought that the wait for them, trusting God for the money to adopt, the negotiations with the consular, etc. were so difficult. I just wanted them home so I could breathe a sigh of relief and begin our new life together.
Don't get me wrong--it is wonderful! But, it is also very hard. There have been moments when I have thought "What have we done?!" There have also been moments when God floods my heart with such peace and such love for these 2 children. Like I said before, adoption is not about rescuing a child, but about obedience to God--and that is what keeps me going, keeps my perspective and my focus on God.
I know some people would like me to be more specific about what has been so hard, so I will try to explain. It is hard to have a child living in your home that you are now responsible for, not just to feed and clothe, but also to love and give affection to--but you just don't know each other yet like you do with your own children. I know my own biological children so well. I know how they will react in each situation, to each form of discipline, to my different tones of voice, to my affection. But, with adoption--it is getting to know someone at a fast-forward pace. It isn't like babysitting, where you are watching your friend's child and you care for them, but you aren't going to kiss all over them and smell their hair like you do with your own child. You also aren't going to discipline them or worry about their health, etc. With adoption, this child comes and you are it--your on--you have to smell their hair, kiss their cheeks and hug them tight and you don't know them yet--and they may not want you to! You have to care about this person that you just met--about their health, their fears, what they are thinking about you and how to break down the barriers. It is uncomfortable to discipline because you want to be liked and loved. You don't have to worry about that with your own children--you don't have to worry that your child will not like you if you discipline them. You also don't have to worry about every frown, every tear, every willful act of disobedience--there is a level of familiarity and comfort and peace with your biological children. With adopted children, you are always worrying on a deeper level--What does that frown mean? Is there something more going on here?
The bottom line is: You don't have their heart yet. It is uncomfortable to call a child your own, but not have their heart. It is hard for me to have to earn their love when I didn't have to with my own children.
I am cutting myself some slack--it has been a week and we have come a long way in a week. I am trying not to expect too much from myself--I guess in terms of feeling or thinking a certain way toward them. I DO love them. I have known *about* them and prayed for them for almost a year, but in reality I have known them for a week. I do want to be liked and loved by them. I want them to love me, our house, my cooking. I want them to be happy here. But, I can't force anything and also I am reminded that familiarity breeds tenderness and affection. It is just time that produces an affinity for certain things because they become tradition and habit and we haven't had time to establish anything yet.
I remember one time at a gathering I complained to another mom about how clingy my baby was. She told me that she wished she had that problem. She is an adoptive parent and she told me about the struggle to have her adopted child love her, want her, reach for her. I just couldn't relate at the time, but now I can. It is a comfortable and uncomfortable place to be--comfortable because I, too, am tentative in this new relationship and need my space, but uncomfortable because I want to fulfill the role of mother so completely that has been missing in their lives. I do want to be needed by them and on a certain level that is a selfish thing! This is not about me! Adoption is not about me feeling good about myself because I did a good deed. It is not solely about them either. It is about our Heavenly Father, obedience to His word, heavenly treasure vs. earthly treasure, and ultimately Jesus Christ and what He did for us.
I hope this makes sense. Adoption is so hard, but so worth it. Jerome and Ruth are amazing children and they are worth it. Most importantly, God is worth it.
Please pray that this transition would go smoothly and that Cameron and I would dwell in the shelter of the Almighty--that we would be confident of His love for us and would communicate that as parents to Jerome and Ruth.
So, to answer your question: we are adjusting well--just as expected and just as God wants. Each "trial" that has come up has been for our good--to help us to face and deal with sin that we didn't know was there before. It has been good for Anna to be challenged by someone so close in age to her. It has been good for Jonas to have a brother and have to share his toys for the first time. It has been good for Elyse to not get all the attention she so desires. And, it has been good for Katria who just seems to go with the flow anyways and seems unphased by all of this.
In Christ, Laura
I will be transparent here and say that it hasn't been easy. When is adjustment easy? I have had a hard time adjusting each time I had a new baby and this, in some ways, is no different. We knew it was going to be a big change--to adopt 2 children from a third-world country in Africa and accept them into our family as our own--but that doesn't make it easier. Expecting it to be difficult doesn't lessen the degree of difficulty. There have been things that we expected that haven't happened--such as food hoarding and bed-wetting and waking up at night. But, there have been other discipline issues that I did not expect. I have been stretched these past few days with Cameron back at work and all of my family gone. But, I have been forced to rely on God and that is ALWAYS a good place to be, no matter what situation we find ourselves in. It is ironic to me now that I thought that the wait for them, trusting God for the money to adopt, the negotiations with the consular, etc. were so difficult. I just wanted them home so I could breathe a sigh of relief and begin our new life together.
Don't get me wrong--it is wonderful! But, it is also very hard. There have been moments when I have thought "What have we done?!" There have also been moments when God floods my heart with such peace and such love for these 2 children. Like I said before, adoption is not about rescuing a child, but about obedience to God--and that is what keeps me going, keeps my perspective and my focus on God.
I know some people would like me to be more specific about what has been so hard, so I will try to explain. It is hard to have a child living in your home that you are now responsible for, not just to feed and clothe, but also to love and give affection to--but you just don't know each other yet like you do with your own children. I know my own biological children so well. I know how they will react in each situation, to each form of discipline, to my different tones of voice, to my affection. But, with adoption--it is getting to know someone at a fast-forward pace. It isn't like babysitting, where you are watching your friend's child and you care for them, but you aren't going to kiss all over them and smell their hair like you do with your own child. You also aren't going to discipline them or worry about their health, etc. With adoption, this child comes and you are it--your on--you have to smell their hair, kiss their cheeks and hug them tight and you don't know them yet--and they may not want you to! You have to care about this person that you just met--about their health, their fears, what they are thinking about you and how to break down the barriers. It is uncomfortable to discipline because you want to be liked and loved. You don't have to worry about that with your own children--you don't have to worry that your child will not like you if you discipline them. You also don't have to worry about every frown, every tear, every willful act of disobedience--there is a level of familiarity and comfort and peace with your biological children. With adopted children, you are always worrying on a deeper level--What does that frown mean? Is there something more going on here?
The bottom line is: You don't have their heart yet. It is uncomfortable to call a child your own, but not have their heart. It is hard for me to have to earn their love when I didn't have to with my own children.
I am cutting myself some slack--it has been a week and we have come a long way in a week. I am trying not to expect too much from myself--I guess in terms of feeling or thinking a certain way toward them. I DO love them. I have known *about* them and prayed for them for almost a year, but in reality I have known them for a week. I do want to be liked and loved by them. I want them to love me, our house, my cooking. I want them to be happy here. But, I can't force anything and also I am reminded that familiarity breeds tenderness and affection. It is just time that produces an affinity for certain things because they become tradition and habit and we haven't had time to establish anything yet.
I remember one time at a gathering I complained to another mom about how clingy my baby was. She told me that she wished she had that problem. She is an adoptive parent and she told me about the struggle to have her adopted child love her, want her, reach for her. I just couldn't relate at the time, but now I can. It is a comfortable and uncomfortable place to be--comfortable because I, too, am tentative in this new relationship and need my space, but uncomfortable because I want to fulfill the role of mother so completely that has been missing in their lives. I do want to be needed by them and on a certain level that is a selfish thing! This is not about me! Adoption is not about me feeling good about myself because I did a good deed. It is not solely about them either. It is about our Heavenly Father, obedience to His word, heavenly treasure vs. earthly treasure, and ultimately Jesus Christ and what He did for us.
I hope this makes sense. Adoption is so hard, but so worth it. Jerome and Ruth are amazing children and they are worth it. Most importantly, God is worth it.
Please pray that this transition would go smoothly and that Cameron and I would dwell in the shelter of the Almighty--that we would be confident of His love for us and would communicate that as parents to Jerome and Ruth.
So, to answer your question: we are adjusting well--just as expected and just as God wants. Each "trial" that has come up has been for our good--to help us to face and deal with sin that we didn't know was there before. It has been good for Anna to be challenged by someone so close in age to her. It has been good for Jonas to have a brother and have to share his toys for the first time. It has been good for Elyse to not get all the attention she so desires. And, it has been good for Katria who just seems to go with the flow anyways and seems unphased by all of this.
In Christ, Laura
Friday, December 28, 2007
Good Day.
Today, I had to go out with all 7 kids (by myself) to have Ruth and Jerome's TB test read and to get Elyse's medicine. Cameron was supposed to get the medicine last night, but he was in surgery all day and didn't get home until 9:30 last night!
So . . . me and all 7 kids, 4 of them sick, on an outing. To say that I was dreading it is an understatement. But, it went surprisingly well! The doctor's visit was quick and painless. TB tests are negative. Then we headed to the pharmacy. The kids were obedient and quiet. So far so good! Next, we stopped at Chick-fil-A (we were in University Mall) and I told the kids we would grab lunch and eat it in the car on the way home. It wasn't too busy, though, and the kids were so well behaved that we decided to eat there. I was so impressed by their behavior! One woman told me that I must be a superwoman--if she only knew! Another woman came up and asked me lots and lots of questions. It made me a little uncomfortable. I know she was just trying to be nice, but I really felt like we were on display. What do I expect, right? Then, the man in the booth behind us told us that our family was beautiful and was so kind. When he left, he handed me something and said "I want to pay for your lunch." I thanked him and he and his wife left. What a blessing! I can't take the credit for the children's good behavior--they deserve it all. They not only blessed others on our outing they blessed me! God sent encouragment my way today just when I needed it! I have been on an emotional roller coaster this week, but today has been good.
Here are some of the little things that have happened this week--some have made me smile and some . . . haven't :)
--Ruthie likes to turn on all the lights. All day. Everywhere I go, I am turning off lights!
--Ruthie is also repeating things we say now. We watched an episode of Little House on the Prairie today and she repeated every line they said in perfect English. She also repeats me. I think she is trying to learn our way of saying things. I can understand her a lot better now. Of course, when her and Jerome talk they lapse back into Liberian English and I can't understand a word. My brother tried to convince me that I was wrong--that they didn't speak English, but a different language--it is that indecipherable!
--Jerome likes to be a helper. He helped my brother take all their bags to the car, he cleans up the playroom, he brought the garbage bin in from the road. And, he is learning to hold the door open for his many sisters and mama.
--Jerome learned what a drinking fountain is today. It was so funny. He was looking at it and I told him to push the bar on the front. You should have seen the look on his face when water squirted out! He tried to drink with his mouth wide open!
--Ruthie squatted to pee-pee in our yard yesterday! (sshhh!)
In Christ, Laura
So . . . me and all 7 kids, 4 of them sick, on an outing. To say that I was dreading it is an understatement. But, it went surprisingly well! The doctor's visit was quick and painless. TB tests are negative. Then we headed to the pharmacy. The kids were obedient and quiet. So far so good! Next, we stopped at Chick-fil-A (we were in University Mall) and I told the kids we would grab lunch and eat it in the car on the way home. It wasn't too busy, though, and the kids were so well behaved that we decided to eat there. I was so impressed by their behavior! One woman told me that I must be a superwoman--if she only knew! Another woman came up and asked me lots and lots of questions. It made me a little uncomfortable. I know she was just trying to be nice, but I really felt like we were on display. What do I expect, right? Then, the man in the booth behind us told us that our family was beautiful and was so kind. When he left, he handed me something and said "I want to pay for your lunch." I thanked him and he and his wife left. What a blessing! I can't take the credit for the children's good behavior--they deserve it all. They not only blessed others on our outing they blessed me! God sent encouragment my way today just when I needed it! I have been on an emotional roller coaster this week, but today has been good.
Here are some of the little things that have happened this week--some have made me smile and some . . . haven't :)
--Ruthie likes to turn on all the lights. All day. Everywhere I go, I am turning off lights!
--Ruthie is also repeating things we say now. We watched an episode of Little House on the Prairie today and she repeated every line they said in perfect English. She also repeats me. I think she is trying to learn our way of saying things. I can understand her a lot better now. Of course, when her and Jerome talk they lapse back into Liberian English and I can't understand a word. My brother tried to convince me that I was wrong--that they didn't speak English, but a different language--it is that indecipherable!
--Jerome likes to be a helper. He helped my brother take all their bags to the car, he cleans up the playroom, he brought the garbage bin in from the road. And, he is learning to hold the door open for his many sisters and mama.
--Jerome learned what a drinking fountain is today. It was so funny. He was looking at it and I told him to push the bar on the front. You should have seen the look on his face when water squirted out! He tried to drink with his mouth wide open!
--Ruthie squatted to pee-pee in our yard yesterday! (sshhh!)
In Christ, Laura
Rough Week.
It has been one rough week. Everyone is sick. Jonas was sick last week and had to go on steroids for his asthma the night before Cameron left to go get Jerome and Ruth. Elyse got sick Monday and has had a fever for 5 days now. She is also wheezing, has a double ear infection and is just so miserable. Katria came down with it Christmas night and Anna yesterday. Now Haven has it and is congested and sleepy and doesn't want to nurse. Poor Jerome and Ruth--having to come into a family of sick kids!
We had my parents and my brother and his wife here for Christmas and everyone left yesterday. I think it will be good for us to get into our family routine--it is difficult with family here to do that.
I hesitate to post too much personal information about Jerome and Ruth and their adjustment issues. It just doesn't seem right. Suffice it to say that it hasn't been easy, as we knew it wouldn't be. Ruth is a very sweet and affectionate little girl. She has called me Mama and comes to me with her concerns. They both sleep great at night and eat well--or should I say, they eat a lot--a lot of meat, but not veggies and dairy and such. Some things they try and like, some things they don't.
Jerome is a quiet, shy boy. He has had a more difficult time adjusting. Actually, I don't know if it is adjusting so much as opening up and obeying. He seems to really like it here and like us. He loved Christmas. He loves playing with his new toys and new brother. He feels comfortable in our home. He is getting more comfortable with me and talking more. We have just had more rough patches with him. This is obviously expected given his age--after much speculating, we just flat out asked him how old he is and he told us he is six, and he will turn 7 in March. He remembers a lot more about his mother leaving him and his life before the orphanage and he was alive for part of the war. He did NOT like the doctor's visit AT ALL. We have to start all their immunizations as if they were infants. This is A LOT of shots.
Pray that our family would get healthy soon. Pray for Cameron and I to have strength--esp. with late night feedings, breathing treatments and doses of motrin. Also, pray that Jerome and Ruth don't come down with this virus--or Cameron and me! Also, pray for wisdom for us as we teach Jerome and Ruth how to be a part of our family, as we tackle behaviour issues and all learn to love one another. It has been my strength to know without any doubt that God called us to this--just as I posted in a previous post. With adoption, those fairytale feelings wax and wane and I have to cling to God--He is the only stable thing in all of this--in any of our lives. I can't base my life on my emotions, but the truth of his word, and I have to bathe each day in his word.
Sorry this post is so "general". I would love to share so many sweet and special moments that have just melted my heart. I would also love to vent about so many frustrations and how God used those to teach me or how God changed my perspective, but life with 7 kids is BUSY. We are truly in "survival mode" right now and will be for awhile.
So, if I don't return your phone call, email, (umm . . . Christmas card . . .) just know that I am thinking of you and I am just so busy in this early adjustment period. We are sort of "dropping out" of life right now and will emerge in awhile when we feel that the time is right. Then, we would love for everyone to meet these 2 precious children.
In Christ, Laura
We had my parents and my brother and his wife here for Christmas and everyone left yesterday. I think it will be good for us to get into our family routine--it is difficult with family here to do that.
I hesitate to post too much personal information about Jerome and Ruth and their adjustment issues. It just doesn't seem right. Suffice it to say that it hasn't been easy, as we knew it wouldn't be. Ruth is a very sweet and affectionate little girl. She has called me Mama and comes to me with her concerns. They both sleep great at night and eat well--or should I say, they eat a lot--a lot of meat, but not veggies and dairy and such. Some things they try and like, some things they don't.
Jerome is a quiet, shy boy. He has had a more difficult time adjusting. Actually, I don't know if it is adjusting so much as opening up and obeying. He seems to really like it here and like us. He loved Christmas. He loves playing with his new toys and new brother. He feels comfortable in our home. He is getting more comfortable with me and talking more. We have just had more rough patches with him. This is obviously expected given his age--after much speculating, we just flat out asked him how old he is and he told us he is six, and he will turn 7 in March. He remembers a lot more about his mother leaving him and his life before the orphanage and he was alive for part of the war. He did NOT like the doctor's visit AT ALL. We have to start all their immunizations as if they were infants. This is A LOT of shots.
Pray that our family would get healthy soon. Pray for Cameron and I to have strength--esp. with late night feedings, breathing treatments and doses of motrin. Also, pray that Jerome and Ruth don't come down with this virus--or Cameron and me! Also, pray for wisdom for us as we teach Jerome and Ruth how to be a part of our family, as we tackle behaviour issues and all learn to love one another. It has been my strength to know without any doubt that God called us to this--just as I posted in a previous post. With adoption, those fairytale feelings wax and wane and I have to cling to God--He is the only stable thing in all of this--in any of our lives. I can't base my life on my emotions, but the truth of his word, and I have to bathe each day in his word.
Sorry this post is so "general". I would love to share so many sweet and special moments that have just melted my heart. I would also love to vent about so many frustrations and how God used those to teach me or how God changed my perspective, but life with 7 kids is BUSY. We are truly in "survival mode" right now and will be for awhile.
So, if I don't return your phone call, email, (umm . . . Christmas card . . .) just know that I am thinking of you and I am just so busy in this early adjustment period. We are sort of "dropping out" of life right now and will emerge in awhile when we feel that the time is right. Then, we would love for everyone to meet these 2 precious children.
In Christ, Laura
Sunday, December 23, 2007
One Big Happy Family!
Jerome and Ruth are here! I am still in disbelief that they are actually here. It is surreal. Cameron and I would look at each other periodically throughout the day and ask each other "Can you believe this? They are here!" As I write this, everyone is sleeping . . .
We had an amazing day! Cameron, Cliff and the kids arrived around 12:30. It wasn't the fairytale meeting at first because right as they pulled up, Jonas started to run, slipped on our sidewalk and smacked the back of his head on the cement! Ouch! So, Jerome and Ruth's first sight of their new family was me trying to comfort a screaming Jonas. One day, I know we will all laugh about it!
We spent the day showing Jerome and Ruth around and just playing. Anna "mothered" Ruth and they stuck to each other like glue. Jonas and Jerome hit it off and played together right away. Katria joined in with them in whatever activity they were doing. Elyse remained unphased by it all--She acted like it was another normal day for her--still her mischevious overly-happy self. Jerome remains quiet and shy. He became more animated around bedtime when he was pushing Katria around the house in a doll stroller! Then, he played a game of "keep-away" with Cameron using everyone's favorite stuffed animals. Ruthie is adorable! She cleared the table for me after dinner and wiped it down! She is quiet, too, but a little more outgoing than Jerome. She likes dolls and dress-up clothes.
I have a million questions I want to ask them, but they are so quiet and I know they don't understand everything we are saying. I will ask them a question and they do one swift nod in answer to everything. They have not spoken enough for me to see if I can understand them. I know life is going to take some adjusting in the next few weeks (or months!), but right now we are enjoying this "honeymoon" period and just getting to know our 2 new children!
I have a million questions I want to ask them, but they are so quiet and I know they don't understand everything we are saying. I will ask them a question and they do one swift nod in answer to everything. They have not spoken enough for me to see if I can understand them. I know life is going to take some adjusting in the next few weeks (or months!), but right now we are enjoying this "honeymoon" period and just getting to know our 2 new children!
Alright--here are some pictures. I know that this is what everyone is REALLY waiting for!
Anna and Ruth were walking along and Anna grabbed Ruth's hand. Katria walked up and Ruth grabbed her hand.
Jerome walked by and Anna grabbed his hand.
Jonas ran up and grabbed Jerome's hand.
Isn't this so cute?! It is amazing that they all just met today for the first time.
Jerome walked by and Anna grabbed his hand.
Jonas ran up and grabbed Jerome's hand.
Isn't this so cute?! It is amazing that they all just met today for the first time.
Jerome is as tall as Anna! We think he may be older than 5 . . .
Ruthie found a pair of shades.
Jerome in the play room.
Ruthie found a pair of shades.
Jerome in the play room.
In Christ, Laura
Saturday, December 22, 2007
Tired.
Cameron and Cliff are on their way home with the kids. Both Jerome and Ruth are asleep in the car, and we are glad that Cameron drove so that they could rest instead of dealing with another plane trip. Cameron says they have been so quiet. He did say that Ruthie recognized him right away and came to him. Jerome is more reserved and shy by nature and hasn't said much.
I can't imagine what they must be thinking . . . everything is new to them--airplanes, carseats, paved roads, cold weather, having a daddy . . . Do they understand what adoption means? Do they understand that we are their family and our home will be their permanent home unlike the orphanage? I don't think they even know what to expect! They are pretty wiped out from the trip and probably have not thought past today. Tomorrow holds so many more new experiences for them! That is one of the great things about adopting older children--seeing their reaction to everything. Hopefully, they will always remember Africa, at least Jerome, and will be able to teach us about Liberian culture. That is something that just isn't possible when you adopt a baby.
I am now glad that I decided not to go with Cameron--the guys have been driving almost all day! I can't imagine what Haven would have been like in the car--and the 8 hour drive was 10 hours with traffic--think of how long it would have taken with having to stop to nurse a baby! Also, Jerome and Ruth have been sleeping almost the entire time--it is not like I am missing a whole lot. I can't wait until I meet them tomorrow! I don't know what to expect!
Cliff has been sending me pictures of them via our cell phones. (Yes, I know. We broke down and got cell phones. Well . . . not me, Cameron got them. Yes, I know that it is safer to have a cell phone in case my car ever breaks down. But, just for the record, the one time my car DID break down, I sat on the curb at a gas station and prayed that Cameron would somehow show up (he was on his way home from work) and he did! Who needs a cell phone when you have God to relay your messages!)
To add to the craziness, my parents and my brother and his wife are coming Christmas Eve. We didn't plan any of this to happen like this. We expected Jerome and Ruth to come the first week in November and we thought we would have a quiet Christmas this year--just our family. Well, the closer Christmas got it looked like Jerome and Ruth wouldn't be coming so we told our family to come. Who knew that the children would come literally the day before my family? God did! He planned it for a reason.
Speaking of which, God has really softened my father's heart toward Jerome and Ruth. He bought Jerome Christmas presents when my parents were out shopping the other day! He doesn't pick out presents--ever. My mom does--even when we were growing up. He didn't pick out gifts for any of our other children. Just Jerome. My mom told him she had already got Jerome presents, but that didn't stop him. He had to get Jerome a Michigan baseball hat and a basketball hoop that lights up for the back of a door. It just touched him when my mom told him about the video in which Jerome and Ruth discovered electricity (did y'all see that one? If not, go back to some older posts and watch it--it is too cute!). My dad never came out and said he was against the adoption. I just don't think he was a big fan of us adding more children to our already large family. I think they will win his heart!
This Christmas is going to be one we will never forget! It is probably the first Christmas for Jerome and Ruth--(we can pretty much count on everything being a first for awhile). It is Haven's first Christmas, but she won't remember it. It is going to be the first time Elyse *thinks* she saw a Christmas tree and presents and such, but it isn't the same. Imagine having a child who has never tried ice cream and being there for their first taste! Or opened a Christmas present! Or peeked in a stocking! How do you explain why we have this tree in the corner of our living room with lights and ornaments decorating it to two African children?
Thank you everyone for your prayers! God has brought our children home! Tomorrow we will be a family of 9!! I NEVER imagined I would have 7 children. I did imagine that I would adopt one day . . . but not 2 children from Liberia, Africa. This is God's story. When you follow Him, He will lead you to places you never would've imagined!
In Christ, Laura
I can't imagine what they must be thinking . . . everything is new to them--airplanes, carseats, paved roads, cold weather, having a daddy . . . Do they understand what adoption means? Do they understand that we are their family and our home will be their permanent home unlike the orphanage? I don't think they even know what to expect! They are pretty wiped out from the trip and probably have not thought past today. Tomorrow holds so many more new experiences for them! That is one of the great things about adopting older children--seeing their reaction to everything. Hopefully, they will always remember Africa, at least Jerome, and will be able to teach us about Liberian culture. That is something that just isn't possible when you adopt a baby.
I am now glad that I decided not to go with Cameron--the guys have been driving almost all day! I can't imagine what Haven would have been like in the car--and the 8 hour drive was 10 hours with traffic--think of how long it would have taken with having to stop to nurse a baby! Also, Jerome and Ruth have been sleeping almost the entire time--it is not like I am missing a whole lot. I can't wait until I meet them tomorrow! I don't know what to expect!
Cliff has been sending me pictures of them via our cell phones. (Yes, I know. We broke down and got cell phones. Well . . . not me, Cameron got them. Yes, I know that it is safer to have a cell phone in case my car ever breaks down. But, just for the record, the one time my car DID break down, I sat on the curb at a gas station and prayed that Cameron would somehow show up (he was on his way home from work) and he did! Who needs a cell phone when you have God to relay your messages!)
To add to the craziness, my parents and my brother and his wife are coming Christmas Eve. We didn't plan any of this to happen like this. We expected Jerome and Ruth to come the first week in November and we thought we would have a quiet Christmas this year--just our family. Well, the closer Christmas got it looked like Jerome and Ruth wouldn't be coming so we told our family to come. Who knew that the children would come literally the day before my family? God did! He planned it for a reason.
Speaking of which, God has really softened my father's heart toward Jerome and Ruth. He bought Jerome Christmas presents when my parents were out shopping the other day! He doesn't pick out presents--ever. My mom does--even when we were growing up. He didn't pick out gifts for any of our other children. Just Jerome. My mom told him she had already got Jerome presents, but that didn't stop him. He had to get Jerome a Michigan baseball hat and a basketball hoop that lights up for the back of a door. It just touched him when my mom told him about the video in which Jerome and Ruth discovered electricity (did y'all see that one? If not, go back to some older posts and watch it--it is too cute!). My dad never came out and said he was against the adoption. I just don't think he was a big fan of us adding more children to our already large family. I think they will win his heart!
This Christmas is going to be one we will never forget! It is probably the first Christmas for Jerome and Ruth--(we can pretty much count on everything being a first for awhile). It is Haven's first Christmas, but she won't remember it. It is going to be the first time Elyse *thinks* she saw a Christmas tree and presents and such, but it isn't the same. Imagine having a child who has never tried ice cream and being there for their first taste! Or opened a Christmas present! Or peeked in a stocking! How do you explain why we have this tree in the corner of our living room with lights and ornaments decorating it to two African children?
Thank you everyone for your prayers! God has brought our children home! Tomorrow we will be a family of 9!! I NEVER imagined I would have 7 children. I did imagine that I would adopt one day . . . but not 2 children from Liberia, Africa. This is God's story. When you follow Him, He will lead you to places you never would've imagined!
In Christ, Laura
They're here!
Their plane landed a few minutes ago! Jerome and Ruth are officially in the country, officially ours! Last I spoke with Cameron, he and Cliff were 5 miles from the airport and were on schedule. After Jerome and Ruth go through customs they will meet Cameron! I wish I could be there for that sweet reunion. Cliff is going to vidoetape it. I wonder if they will be tired, nervous, excited, shy, happy, sad . . .??
I can't believe I have to wait another 24 hours to meet them! I can't wait!
I still can't believe this is real--something that we have looked forward to for a year--and longer if you count from when we decided to pursue adoption--is finally happening!
I will post more later when I hear how the kids are doing.
In Christ, Laura
I can't believe I have to wait another 24 hours to meet them! I can't wait!
I still can't believe this is real--something that we have looked forward to for a year--and longer if you count from when we decided to pursue adoption--is finally happening!
I will post more later when I hear how the kids are doing.
In Christ, Laura
Friday, December 21, 2007
PRAISE GOD!
Praise God! They got the visas and our children are COMING HOME!! We just got the phone call about 15 minutes ago from our adoption agency. We are rejoicing! Right now, Cameron is in surgery. I paged him and a nurse called me back and asked "Is it good news or bad news?" I said "It's good news!" I heard her announce it in the operating room and then I heard the entire room erupt in cheers! It is so exciting that so many people are rejoicing with us!
My children, when they heard, began to jump up and down and dance and cheer. I had to send them down to their play room so they wouldn't wake up Haven. They are playing music and dancing down there!
We are so excited to have Jerome and Ruth home for Christmas. We are rejoicing that they will be a part of our family. They are leaving for the airport in about 1/2 an hour. Their flight leaves Liberia at 7 pm, which is 2 pm our time. Pray for them as they leave their country, and continent behind--and all that is familiar to them. Pray for Sydnee as she travels with them. Also pray for the other 2 families whose children were scheduled to come home with Jerome and Ruth-they will not be coming. Pray that God would give them joy this Christmas season and peace that His plan for their children's arrival is perfect and what is best for them. Pray that God would give them grace. Hearing this news does make our news bittersweet.
Cameron and Cliff will leave early tomorrow morning to go to New York to get them. I will stay behind and get everything ready for their arrival. Many people have asked why I am not going to get them, too. I would love to, but traveling with Haven in a car is not an enjoyable experience. She doesn't particularly like her car seat and cries most of the time in it. It would be a pretty stressful trip. Also, can you imagine Jerome and Ruth having to listen to this crying baby all the way home? In addition, nursing her would tack so much extra time on the trip. I am content to stay home and wait for them.
Thank you for all of your prayers and words of encouragement. Thank you for your support and love.
We will post more updates as we receive them (when their plane comes in and Cameron is reunited with them!) and maybe some pictures in the coming days.
Praise God!
In Christ, Laura
My children, when they heard, began to jump up and down and dance and cheer. I had to send them down to their play room so they wouldn't wake up Haven. They are playing music and dancing down there!
We are so excited to have Jerome and Ruth home for Christmas. We are rejoicing that they will be a part of our family. They are leaving for the airport in about 1/2 an hour. Their flight leaves Liberia at 7 pm, which is 2 pm our time. Pray for them as they leave their country, and continent behind--and all that is familiar to them. Pray for Sydnee as she travels with them. Also pray for the other 2 families whose children were scheduled to come home with Jerome and Ruth-they will not be coming. Pray that God would give them joy this Christmas season and peace that His plan for their children's arrival is perfect and what is best for them. Pray that God would give them grace. Hearing this news does make our news bittersweet.
Cameron and Cliff will leave early tomorrow morning to go to New York to get them. I will stay behind and get everything ready for their arrival. Many people have asked why I am not going to get them, too. I would love to, but traveling with Haven in a car is not an enjoyable experience. She doesn't particularly like her car seat and cries most of the time in it. It would be a pretty stressful trip. Also, can you imagine Jerome and Ruth having to listen to this crying baby all the way home? In addition, nursing her would tack so much extra time on the trip. I am content to stay home and wait for them.
Thank you for all of your prayers and words of encouragement. Thank you for your support and love.
We will post more updates as we receive them (when their plane comes in and Cameron is reunited with them!) and maybe some pictures in the coming days.
Praise God!
In Christ, Laura
Thursday, December 20, 2007
Visa
I talked to Acres of Hope in Liberia today and the latest word from the embassy is that the visas will be issued tomorrow. I don't want to doubt, but why is it always "tomorrow"? We have to pray that this really happens, because if it doesn't, our children will not be on that plane tomorrow. I emailed the consular yesterday to find out when she will issue the visas and she has yet to respond to me. It is so difficult to not be frustrated with this process, but I trust that God's timing is ALWAYS perfect and for my good.
Pray for the visas!
In Christ, Laura
Pray for the visas!
In Christ, Laura
Wednesday, December 19, 2007
On a Different Subject . . .
Here are a few highlights from our family life this week:
Today, Katria was playing with my hair while I read a book to her, Elyse, and Jonas. She told me that she had to run and get something and when she came back, I felt a comb running through my hair. A few minutes later she announced that she had to go get something again. When she came back, I assumed she had brought some barrettes to put in my hair. Well, I felt this tugging on my hair and heard this peculiar noise . . . I turned around and she had a pair of kid's scissors and was attempting to cut my hair!!! I think I caught her in time, but I really haven't checked the back of my hair yet!
Yesterday morning, Anna overheard Cameron and I discussing the amount of money we have left to pay for travel expenses for our adoption. A few minutes later, she handed me an envelope with "1$" written on it. Inside was a bunch of change. She said that she wanted to help with the adoption. She was so sincere that it was so sweet. A few hours later, Jonas was putting on his coat to go play outside, he reached in his pocket and found a dollar bill! Where did that come from? I wish that would happen to me sometime! Anyway, he handed it to me and told me that he wanted to give it for the adoption. I asked if he was sure and told him he could use it for Christmas presents. He told me that this was a Christmas present--bringing them home. It was so touching to see their generosity when usually they talk of what they would like to buy with their savings.
The kids have been enjoying the displays of Christmas lights. We have moved to the northern part of our city and although we are out in the country so many more houses are decorated than where we used to live. We visited one house that was so decked out that the lights blinked in time to the Christmas music on a radio station that you tuned into in the car!! A few years ago, we started the tradition of saying "Merry Christmas!" everytime we see Christmas lights. Well, this was when we only had 2 children! Now, we have 4 talkers and it gets pretty noisy when we are driving anywhere! There is a constant chorus of "Merry Christmas!" shouted in our van for the duration of our trip! And then there is Elyse in her sweet high voice saying, "Merry Christmas to AWWWLLLL!!"
Anna made all of her Christmas presents this year. The girls have a rather large closet and she has turned it into her little "workshop". Cameron and I have been pretty impressed with her because she started making her presents back in October and was done with them before we even bought one present! She has been working so hard. And she is so serious! For several hours a day she would disappear into her closet to work. She has made presents for everyone, including her grandparents and her aunt and uncle that will be here for Christmas. The only exception is Cameron. She had to buy him a present and I will tell you why . . . One day, she told me what she was making him and I had to break it to her that it wasn't going to work. I just didn't want her little heart broken when Cameron didn't wear his present. She was making him slippers . . . out of cardboard! She had cut out pieces for the bottom of his feet, but couldn't figure out a way to attach them to his feet so he could walk in them!! Trying to keep a straight face as I pictured Cameron in these, I asked her how did she know what size he wore. Her little face fell and she told me she didn't think it was going to work. However, I suggested several items that daddy needed and she bought one of those things--and I can't tell you what it is because someone may be snooping here. He is just going to have to wait and see on Christmas morning!
Now, if anyone has any suggestions for how to maintain the chaos of gift unwrapping on Christmas morning, please leave it in the comments. We are tossing around several ideas--
We are looking forward to Christmas with my parents and the traditional pierogi dinner we have enjoyed since I was a child. Yes, we still do have ham, but that is just a side dish compared to our homemade pierogi! You see, my family is Polish and my grandma made pierogi every year for Christmas. My aunt carried on the tradition when my grandma passed away. Since we haven't been "home" for Christmas in Michigan for 5 years, we haven't had pierogi. This year, my mom made some. I hope they are as good as grandma's!
We are enjoying all of the Christmas preparations and we are looking forward (God willing) to having Jerome and Ruth join our family for Christmas. Now if we could only have a white Christmas . . .
In Christ, Laura
Today, Katria was playing with my hair while I read a book to her, Elyse, and Jonas. She told me that she had to run and get something and when she came back, I felt a comb running through my hair. A few minutes later she announced that she had to go get something again. When she came back, I assumed she had brought some barrettes to put in my hair. Well, I felt this tugging on my hair and heard this peculiar noise . . . I turned around and she had a pair of kid's scissors and was attempting to cut my hair!!! I think I caught her in time, but I really haven't checked the back of my hair yet!
Yesterday morning, Anna overheard Cameron and I discussing the amount of money we have left to pay for travel expenses for our adoption. A few minutes later, she handed me an envelope with "1$" written on it. Inside was a bunch of change. She said that she wanted to help with the adoption. She was so sincere that it was so sweet. A few hours later, Jonas was putting on his coat to go play outside, he reached in his pocket and found a dollar bill! Where did that come from? I wish that would happen to me sometime! Anyway, he handed it to me and told me that he wanted to give it for the adoption. I asked if he was sure and told him he could use it for Christmas presents. He told me that this was a Christmas present--bringing them home. It was so touching to see their generosity when usually they talk of what they would like to buy with their savings.
The kids have been enjoying the displays of Christmas lights. We have moved to the northern part of our city and although we are out in the country so many more houses are decorated than where we used to live. We visited one house that was so decked out that the lights blinked in time to the Christmas music on a radio station that you tuned into in the car!! A few years ago, we started the tradition of saying "Merry Christmas!" everytime we see Christmas lights. Well, this was when we only had 2 children! Now, we have 4 talkers and it gets pretty noisy when we are driving anywhere! There is a constant chorus of "Merry Christmas!" shouted in our van for the duration of our trip! And then there is Elyse in her sweet high voice saying, "Merry Christmas to AWWWLLLL!!"
Anna made all of her Christmas presents this year. The girls have a rather large closet and she has turned it into her little "workshop". Cameron and I have been pretty impressed with her because she started making her presents back in October and was done with them before we even bought one present! She has been working so hard. And she is so serious! For several hours a day she would disappear into her closet to work. She has made presents for everyone, including her grandparents and her aunt and uncle that will be here for Christmas. The only exception is Cameron. She had to buy him a present and I will tell you why . . . One day, she told me what she was making him and I had to break it to her that it wasn't going to work. I just didn't want her little heart broken when Cameron didn't wear his present. She was making him slippers . . . out of cardboard! She had cut out pieces for the bottom of his feet, but couldn't figure out a way to attach them to his feet so he could walk in them!! Trying to keep a straight face as I pictured Cameron in these, I asked her how did she know what size he wore. Her little face fell and she told me she didn't think it was going to work. However, I suggested several items that daddy needed and she bought one of those things--and I can't tell you what it is because someone may be snooping here. He is just going to have to wait and see on Christmas morning!
Now, if anyone has any suggestions for how to maintain the chaos of gift unwrapping on Christmas morning, please leave it in the comments. We are tossing around several ideas--
We are looking forward to Christmas with my parents and the traditional pierogi dinner we have enjoyed since I was a child. Yes, we still do have ham, but that is just a side dish compared to our homemade pierogi! You see, my family is Polish and my grandma made pierogi every year for Christmas. My aunt carried on the tradition when my grandma passed away. Since we haven't been "home" for Christmas in Michigan for 5 years, we haven't had pierogi. This year, my mom made some. I hope they are as good as grandma's!
We are enjoying all of the Christmas preparations and we are looking forward (God willing) to having Jerome and Ruth join our family for Christmas. Now if we could only have a white Christmas . . .
In Christ, Laura
Encouraging
My good friend, Miranda, posted this on her blog and it was so encouraging to me, and so timely, that I wanted to share it here, too. It is from Spurgeon's "Morning and Evening" and it is from the morning section for today--Dec. 19th.
It says:
"The lot is cast into the lap, but the whole disposing thereof is from the Lord." Proverbs 16:33
If the disposal of the lot is the Lord's, whose is the arrangement of our whole life? If the simple casting of the lot is guided by Him, how much more the events of our entire life--especially when we are told by our blessed Saviour: "The very hairs of your hear are all numbered: Not a sparrow falleth to the ground without your Father." It would bring a holy calm over your mind, dear friend, if you were always to remember this. It would so relieve your mind from anxiety, that you would be the better able to walk in patience, quiet and cheerfulness as a Christian should. When a man is anxious he cannot pray with faith, when he is troubled about the world, he cannot serve his Master, his thoughts are serving himself. If you would "seek first the kinddom of God and his righteousness," all things would then be added unto you. You are meddling with Christ's business, and neglecting your own when you fret about your lot and circumstances. You have been trying "providing" work and forgetting that it is yours to obey. Be wise and attend to the obeying, and let Christ manage the providing. Come and survey your Father's storehouse, and ask whether he will let you starve while He has laid up so great an abundance in His garner? Look at His heart of mercy; see if that can ever prove unkind! Look at His inscrutable wisdom; see if that will ever be at fault. Above all, look up to Jesus Christ your Intercessor, and ask yourself, while He pleads, can your Father deal ungraciously with you? If He remembers even sparrows, will He forget one of the least of His poor children? "Cast they burden upon the Lord, and He will sustain thee. He will never suffer the righteous to be moved."
It is mine to obey and cast my cares on Him. It is His to accomplish His will. Why, then, should I be anxious?
In Christ, Laura
It says:
"The lot is cast into the lap, but the whole disposing thereof is from the Lord." Proverbs 16:33
If the disposal of the lot is the Lord's, whose is the arrangement of our whole life? If the simple casting of the lot is guided by Him, how much more the events of our entire life--especially when we are told by our blessed Saviour: "The very hairs of your hear are all numbered: Not a sparrow falleth to the ground without your Father." It would bring a holy calm over your mind, dear friend, if you were always to remember this. It would so relieve your mind from anxiety, that you would be the better able to walk in patience, quiet and cheerfulness as a Christian should. When a man is anxious he cannot pray with faith, when he is troubled about the world, he cannot serve his Master, his thoughts are serving himself. If you would "seek first the kinddom of God and his righteousness," all things would then be added unto you. You are meddling with Christ's business, and neglecting your own when you fret about your lot and circumstances. You have been trying "providing" work and forgetting that it is yours to obey. Be wise and attend to the obeying, and let Christ manage the providing. Come and survey your Father's storehouse, and ask whether he will let you starve while He has laid up so great an abundance in His garner? Look at His heart of mercy; see if that can ever prove unkind! Look at His inscrutable wisdom; see if that will ever be at fault. Above all, look up to Jesus Christ your Intercessor, and ask yourself, while He pleads, can your Father deal ungraciously with you? If He remembers even sparrows, will He forget one of the least of His poor children? "Cast they burden upon the Lord, and He will sustain thee. He will never suffer the righteous to be moved."
It is mine to obey and cast my cares on Him. It is His to accomplish His will. Why, then, should I be anxious?
In Christ, Laura
No Visa Yet.
We are getting down to the final days before Jerome and Ruth are scheduled to come home and the consular has not issued the visas yet. Please pray that they will be issued tomorrow. Pray also that we would trust in God and not in man. We are making plans for Jerome and Ruth to be home for Christmas, but I am almost afraid to believe that it is going to happen. Pray that I would have joy no matter the outcome. It is so easy to get discouraged when all we can do is wait . . . and pray.
In Christ, Laura
In Christ, Laura
Monday, December 17, 2007
Response to letter from the Z family
This post is written in response to a recent letter written by the Z family and posted on their blog regarding their experiences with our adoption agency. Having been to Liberia on two separate occasions, the first of which was as a volunteer working for this agency for a month, I feel obligated to address some of the concerns they have raised about it. I do this out of the same motivations they expressed at the beginning of their letter: a responsibility to the truth. As many of you know our own adoption journey has been wrought with frustrations and difficulties, many of which are a result of problems that do exist within the agency. The experiences that the Z family have written about are shared experiences by us, and most likely many other families who are adopting from this agency. There is much in their letter that I agree with, but there are other things that I do not believe, based on my own experiences, to be true. I am worried that some of what was said will lead to unfounded fear and anxiety for families whose adoptions have yet to be completed or who are considering adopting through our agency. I hope to alleviate some of those fears and anxieties. Please know, Z family (if you are reading this), that I am not responding to your letter out of anger or malice. I am concerned, however, about the ramifications of such a public letter that may go beyond causing unfounded anxiety for other adopting families. It was mentioned that their letter is being sent to Government Officials so that "they might assist [the agency] in bettering their practices as they are able". Now I do not know which Government Officials they are referring to but I do know that when certain "government officials" get involved in response to concerns such as those raised by the Z family there is no attempt to "assist" the agency. Rather the agencies in question are often shut down, either temporarily or permanently, and all ongoing adoptions are stopped. There would be no assistance of the agency. There may be an investigation with a later re-issuing of the agency's adoption license if the investigation goes well, but no assistance. If an adoption agency/orphanage is found, by investigation, to be guilty of child neglect or misuse of funds (which is being suggested about our agency by the Z family) they are not aided by government officials to get things right, they are simply shut down, end of story. I pray this does not happen to our agency as a result of the letter by the Z family or possibly by others. The effect on the many adoptions that have not been completed could be devestating.
Now to address some of the specific issues mentioned in the letter. . .
I am not going to say much in response to the complaints about the communication problems between our agency and adopting families. I agree that there are some problems. We have experienced them ourselves and at times have been very frustrated. But, having witnessed first hand the challenges that the staff, both U.S. and Liberian, face on a daily basis, I understand why these problems happen. I also see that our agency is already working on making improvements in the area of communication with adopting families.
I am more concerned with addressing the suggestions in the Z family's letter of child neglect/malnourishment and the misuse of adoption funds. Both of these suggestions or accusations, I believe, are based on lack of information and misunderstandings and I would like to shed more light on these issues in hopes of alleviating concerns.
First, the children in the orphanges of our agency are NOT malnourished nor neglected. I have been there and worked in the orphanages. The women who serve as nannies work very hard and take excellent care of all the children. Are they able to spend every minute with every child, interacting with him or her? Are they able to respond immediately to a child who cries out? Of course not. There are nearly 50 children in each orphanage at a time. But, they certainly do not neglect them. They are loved dearly by those nannies. The Z family described the orphanage as being silent when they visited with all the babies sitting in their cribs. There is a reason for this. Most of the time when adopting parents are coming to get their child to be united with him or her for the first time the nannies are told ahead time that the parents are coming, often with a phone call while the parents are in route. They are instructed to keep all the other children in their rooms, the babies in their cribs and the place quiet. Why? So that the experience for the parents and their child is pleasent and peaceful. I don't know about you but meeting my child for the first time with a host of other children running around trying to get my attention does not sound pleasant. When I went and met Jerome and Ruth for the first time, the other approximately 48 kids were kept in another room and told to be quiet while we shared our first moments together. This was done out of respect for the fact that we were meeting each other for the first time. I could hear Jerome and Ruth when they spoke and they could hear me. It was great! Another explanation for what the Z family saw is that they went to the orphanage during nap time. Now, although not all the children sleep, there is a two hour nap time (usually from 1-3pm) everyday at both orphanages. These are some of the most silent moments in the orphanage. Regardless, whether it was nap time or the nannies were just doing what they were told, what the Z family experienced, in my opinion, was not a sign of neglect. The times I have been there I have seen babies held and pampered by the nannies, toddlers read to, and older kids played with. I have seen 2, 3, 4 and 5 year old children (Jerome included) recite Scripture. Neglected children don't memorize Scripture.
The accusation of malnourishment is also unfounded. First, as a phycisian, I still cannot wrap my mind around how a pediatrician can tell from examining a child's abdomen that "there had been times when he had not had enough to eat." This does not make sense to me. It simply is not possible. Only in cases of severe, ongoing malnourishment does the abdomen of a child suggest it on physical examination. Now I cannot speak to why teh Z family were told this by their pediatrician. I can, however, say that the accusation that children in the agency's orphanages are malnourished cannot be substatiated by this information. It also cannot be substantiated by the way their son responded to his initial bottle feedings. Many eight-month-old children, whether Liberian or American, will gulp down bottles at alarming speed. This is not a sign that they are starving and want to get in as much as they can as fast as they can. Sometimes the milk, due to a large caliber nipple or the type of bottle, comes too fast and they are simply trying to keep up. As a father of five children and as an obstetrician I have witnessed this many times. Sometimes it has nothing to do with the bottle or nipple. The child is simply a great sucker and is able to take a lot quickly; often so fast that their stomach can fill with 8, 10, 12 ounces before their immature nerve pathways can get the signal to their brain fast enough to tell it that they are full. And what is a normal infant or baby response to being too full? Yes, vomiting. It is a well known fact of physiology that stretch receptors in the smooth muscle cells of the stomach will stimulate a vomiting response if the smooth muscle cells are stretched too much. The way their son responded to his feedings, in my opinion, is within the realm of normal for a child his age and NOT a sign of malnourishment. I would also like everyone to look at all the photos of their son (he's adorable by the way) that were taken while he was still in Liberia. This is not a malnourished child. I have seen and cared for malnourished children in Liberia. He was not malnourished. He is extremely healthy looking and happy. He and all the children in the agency's orphanages are well fed and well cared for. I stand firm as a witness to this fact. It is a blessing and a luxury for the orphans to live in these orphanages.
Lastly, I would like to address the suggestion that our agency is misusing the adoption funds or at least directing funding away from the children. This simply is not true. Corey and Jamie spoke from observations they made without supporting information. All they had to do was inquire further and they would have been better informed. Not a single cent of the money that is made from the adoptions is going toward the current construction project. It is being funded by donations given to the agency for the specific purpose of building a place for the agency's founder, her family, full-time missionaries and guests to live in Liberia. It is also being funded by money that the founder makes through speaking engagements. Not a cent of the building project funds come from the adoptions. And why all the supplies at the construction site? Because the construction is being done by a Chinese contractor who has at his disposal an abundant supply of money and supplies from his company who, by the way, wanted this job, not to make money off of the agency but to show the Liberian and Chinese governments that they are involved in "charity" work. There is incentive for them to do this job and to do it well. I can say with certainty that every cent of the orphan fee and all other fees goes to supporting the adoptions and not to other non-adoption projects. Also, before anyone accuses our agency of mishandling funds they should know that the founder and her husband put every penny of their OWN money, their life savings into the construction of what was supposed to be the new orphanage. They lost it all because the construction was led by a man who misled the agency and completely screwed up the construction. Not a bit of adoption money was used in the construction; only the founder's life savings. My heart hurt for them when I saw the building just a few weeks ago and still hurts for them. You may ask why the speaking engagement money or other donations is not used for the improvement of the orphanages. First, I will say that I do not believe the conditions at the orphanages are as bad as the Z family has led people to believe. They have not seen other orphanages in Liberia. I have and one descriptive word comes to mind - horrendous. Our agency's orphanages are immaculate compared to others. Secondly, I will say that other sources of money (donations, speaking engagements, etc.) have been used at times for the orphanages. During my recent visit I saw several improvements - tons of new bunk beds, new cribs, new toddler beds, higher walls, newly placed barbed wire around the walls, and a new well at the older kids orphanage. These improvements were, in part, funded by other sources outside of the fees we pay. Lastly, I can say, from having lived and worked with them, that the founder, her husband and the agency's staff are people of integrity. They have high standards for how money is used and in no way use the money we, as adopting families, pay for their own personal gain or for micellaneous projects.
When I read the letter by the Z family I had mixed feelings. There are parts which I was pleased that they spoke out on. I agree that certain problems within the agency, specifically those of communication, need to be addressed and their letter stated the issues well. There are, however, parts that disturbed me. They have accused our agency of neglecting children to the point of malnourishment and of misusing funds. I hope that my response to these accusations helps others to see that these accusations are unfounded and should not have been made. I do not intend by this response to their letter to reflect poorly on the Z family. I only offer another perspective based on first hand experience. There is so much about Liberia, our agency's orphanages and the adoption processes in Liberia that remain unknown to most people. As a result of the unknown, assumptions and misunderstanding occur. Therefore, we need to be careful about what we tell others. Our agency is an excellent organization. They are not perfect but they are still excellent and constantly striving to improve. They work hard day and night (I have witnessed staff members staying up until 2 or 3 am just to keep up with the rapid pace of these adoptions) to care for the orphans and keep the adoptions going. They need our support and prayers.
Now to address some of the specific issues mentioned in the letter. . .
I am not going to say much in response to the complaints about the communication problems between our agency and adopting families. I agree that there are some problems. We have experienced them ourselves and at times have been very frustrated. But, having witnessed first hand the challenges that the staff, both U.S. and Liberian, face on a daily basis, I understand why these problems happen. I also see that our agency is already working on making improvements in the area of communication with adopting families.
I am more concerned with addressing the suggestions in the Z family's letter of child neglect/malnourishment and the misuse of adoption funds. Both of these suggestions or accusations, I believe, are based on lack of information and misunderstandings and I would like to shed more light on these issues in hopes of alleviating concerns.
First, the children in the orphanges of our agency are NOT malnourished nor neglected. I have been there and worked in the orphanages. The women who serve as nannies work very hard and take excellent care of all the children. Are they able to spend every minute with every child, interacting with him or her? Are they able to respond immediately to a child who cries out? Of course not. There are nearly 50 children in each orphanage at a time. But, they certainly do not neglect them. They are loved dearly by those nannies. The Z family described the orphanage as being silent when they visited with all the babies sitting in their cribs. There is a reason for this. Most of the time when adopting parents are coming to get their child to be united with him or her for the first time the nannies are told ahead time that the parents are coming, often with a phone call while the parents are in route. They are instructed to keep all the other children in their rooms, the babies in their cribs and the place quiet. Why? So that the experience for the parents and their child is pleasent and peaceful. I don't know about you but meeting my child for the first time with a host of other children running around trying to get my attention does not sound pleasant. When I went and met Jerome and Ruth for the first time, the other approximately 48 kids were kept in another room and told to be quiet while we shared our first moments together. This was done out of respect for the fact that we were meeting each other for the first time. I could hear Jerome and Ruth when they spoke and they could hear me. It was great! Another explanation for what the Z family saw is that they went to the orphanage during nap time. Now, although not all the children sleep, there is a two hour nap time (usually from 1-3pm) everyday at both orphanages. These are some of the most silent moments in the orphanage. Regardless, whether it was nap time or the nannies were just doing what they were told, what the Z family experienced, in my opinion, was not a sign of neglect. The times I have been there I have seen babies held and pampered by the nannies, toddlers read to, and older kids played with. I have seen 2, 3, 4 and 5 year old children (Jerome included) recite Scripture. Neglected children don't memorize Scripture.
The accusation of malnourishment is also unfounded. First, as a phycisian, I still cannot wrap my mind around how a pediatrician can tell from examining a child's abdomen that "there had been times when he had not had enough to eat." This does not make sense to me. It simply is not possible. Only in cases of severe, ongoing malnourishment does the abdomen of a child suggest it on physical examination. Now I cannot speak to why teh Z family were told this by their pediatrician. I can, however, say that the accusation that children in the agency's orphanages are malnourished cannot be substatiated by this information. It also cannot be substantiated by the way their son responded to his initial bottle feedings. Many eight-month-old children, whether Liberian or American, will gulp down bottles at alarming speed. This is not a sign that they are starving and want to get in as much as they can as fast as they can. Sometimes the milk, due to a large caliber nipple or the type of bottle, comes too fast and they are simply trying to keep up. As a father of five children and as an obstetrician I have witnessed this many times. Sometimes it has nothing to do with the bottle or nipple. The child is simply a great sucker and is able to take a lot quickly; often so fast that their stomach can fill with 8, 10, 12 ounces before their immature nerve pathways can get the signal to their brain fast enough to tell it that they are full. And what is a normal infant or baby response to being too full? Yes, vomiting. It is a well known fact of physiology that stretch receptors in the smooth muscle cells of the stomach will stimulate a vomiting response if the smooth muscle cells are stretched too much. The way their son responded to his feedings, in my opinion, is within the realm of normal for a child his age and NOT a sign of malnourishment. I would also like everyone to look at all the photos of their son (he's adorable by the way) that were taken while he was still in Liberia. This is not a malnourished child. I have seen and cared for malnourished children in Liberia. He was not malnourished. He is extremely healthy looking and happy. He and all the children in the agency's orphanages are well fed and well cared for. I stand firm as a witness to this fact. It is a blessing and a luxury for the orphans to live in these orphanages.
Lastly, I would like to address the suggestion that our agency is misusing the adoption funds or at least directing funding away from the children. This simply is not true. Corey and Jamie spoke from observations they made without supporting information. All they had to do was inquire further and they would have been better informed. Not a single cent of the money that is made from the adoptions is going toward the current construction project. It is being funded by donations given to the agency for the specific purpose of building a place for the agency's founder, her family, full-time missionaries and guests to live in Liberia. It is also being funded by money that the founder makes through speaking engagements. Not a cent of the building project funds come from the adoptions. And why all the supplies at the construction site? Because the construction is being done by a Chinese contractor who has at his disposal an abundant supply of money and supplies from his company who, by the way, wanted this job, not to make money off of the agency but to show the Liberian and Chinese governments that they are involved in "charity" work. There is incentive for them to do this job and to do it well. I can say with certainty that every cent of the orphan fee and all other fees goes to supporting the adoptions and not to other non-adoption projects. Also, before anyone accuses our agency of mishandling funds they should know that the founder and her husband put every penny of their OWN money, their life savings into the construction of what was supposed to be the new orphanage. They lost it all because the construction was led by a man who misled the agency and completely screwed up the construction. Not a bit of adoption money was used in the construction; only the founder's life savings. My heart hurt for them when I saw the building just a few weeks ago and still hurts for them. You may ask why the speaking engagement money or other donations is not used for the improvement of the orphanages. First, I will say that I do not believe the conditions at the orphanages are as bad as the Z family has led people to believe. They have not seen other orphanages in Liberia. I have and one descriptive word comes to mind - horrendous. Our agency's orphanages are immaculate compared to others. Secondly, I will say that other sources of money (donations, speaking engagements, etc.) have been used at times for the orphanages. During my recent visit I saw several improvements - tons of new bunk beds, new cribs, new toddler beds, higher walls, newly placed barbed wire around the walls, and a new well at the older kids orphanage. These improvements were, in part, funded by other sources outside of the fees we pay. Lastly, I can say, from having lived and worked with them, that the founder, her husband and the agency's staff are people of integrity. They have high standards for how money is used and in no way use the money we, as adopting families, pay for their own personal gain or for micellaneous projects.
When I read the letter by the Z family I had mixed feelings. There are parts which I was pleased that they spoke out on. I agree that certain problems within the agency, specifically those of communication, need to be addressed and their letter stated the issues well. There are, however, parts that disturbed me. They have accused our agency of neglecting children to the point of malnourishment and of misusing funds. I hope that my response to these accusations helps others to see that these accusations are unfounded and should not have been made. I do not intend by this response to their letter to reflect poorly on the Z family. I only offer another perspective based on first hand experience. There is so much about Liberia, our agency's orphanages and the adoption processes in Liberia that remain unknown to most people. As a result of the unknown, assumptions and misunderstanding occur. Therefore, we need to be careful about what we tell others. Our agency is an excellent organization. They are not perfect but they are still excellent and constantly striving to improve. They work hard day and night (I have witnessed staff members staying up until 2 or 3 am just to keep up with the rapid pace of these adoptions) to care for the orphans and keep the adoptions going. They need our support and prayers.
Sincerely,
Cameron
A Correction and Our Plans.
I wrote in a previous post that the kids were arriving on the 23rd, but they are coming on the 22nd. Their plane arrives at JFK airport at 1:20 on Saturday, Dec. 22nd.
Our plan is that Cameron and Cliff are going to drive to get them. After much discussion with each other, and people in our fellowship group ; ) and prayer, we think it would be best to drive. The children are going to be exhausted when they get in. Remaining in an airport for 5 more hours just to catch another plan is going to be too much. No one can really relax in an airport wiht all the activity going on. Now picture 2 children who have never seen technology before. They are going to need to rest and a car is just the thing to allow them to go to sleep (hopefully). They will travel halfway home and then get a room for the night (the drive is about 8 hours). We did not want their first experience of their new home and siblings and mama :) to be late at night and in the dark after flying and driving all day. So, they will stop and rest and drive the remaining distance on Sunday. They will arrive around lunchtime and have all day to explore their new surroundings and meet their new family.
We are still waiting to hear if they received their visas today. Please pray that the consular stayed true to her word to issue these.
I will post as soon as I hear. Then, our travel plans will be definite!
Thank you for your prayers!
In Christ, Laura
Our plan is that Cameron and Cliff are going to drive to get them. After much discussion with each other, and people in our fellowship group ; ) and prayer, we think it would be best to drive. The children are going to be exhausted when they get in. Remaining in an airport for 5 more hours just to catch another plan is going to be too much. No one can really relax in an airport wiht all the activity going on. Now picture 2 children who have never seen technology before. They are going to need to rest and a car is just the thing to allow them to go to sleep (hopefully). They will travel halfway home and then get a room for the night (the drive is about 8 hours). We did not want their first experience of their new home and siblings and mama :) to be late at night and in the dark after flying and driving all day. So, they will stop and rest and drive the remaining distance on Sunday. They will arrive around lunchtime and have all day to explore their new surroundings and meet their new family.
We are still waiting to hear if they received their visas today. Please pray that the consular stayed true to her word to issue these.
I will post as soon as I hear. Then, our travel plans will be definite!
Thank you for your prayers!
In Christ, Laura
Saturday, December 15, 2007
Our Good Friends, The Martins . . .
Our good friends, the Martins, just got their referral yesterday for the little girl they are adopting from Ethiopia. We are so excited for them! We started this journey together with them a couple years back. One late night, as all of our little ones slept, we talked about adopting--one day. I remember that we watched a video online that not only brought tears to our eyes, but inspired us to pursue adoption.
The Martins, Paul and Miranda, have said that we gave them the final "push" to begin their adoption because they saw us pursuing it. However, it was that night with them that convinced Cameron and I that now was the time to adopt. Their perspective on God's heart for adoption was what lit a fire in our hearts. The Martins have encouraged and supported us during this long adoption journey. As iron sharpens iron, they have been that kind of friend to us. Our hearts have been knit together with theirs by going through adoption together. It is amazing how God is bringing both of our adoptions to completion at the same time!
We love you guys and are so excited for you to bring home your baby girl, Felicity! Praise God for His faithfulness and His goodness. He placed this desire in both of our family's hearts and He has seen it through to completion. Thank you for being so bold to speak truth to me, Miranda, when I was tempted to be discouraged. I pray that everyone can have friends like you guys!
Check out their baby girl at: http://themartinsandethiopia.blogspot.com/
In Christ, Laura
The Martins, Paul and Miranda, have said that we gave them the final "push" to begin their adoption because they saw us pursuing it. However, it was that night with them that convinced Cameron and I that now was the time to adopt. Their perspective on God's heart for adoption was what lit a fire in our hearts. The Martins have encouraged and supported us during this long adoption journey. As iron sharpens iron, they have been that kind of friend to us. Our hearts have been knit together with theirs by going through adoption together. It is amazing how God is bringing both of our adoptions to completion at the same time!
We love you guys and are so excited for you to bring home your baby girl, Felicity! Praise God for His faithfulness and His goodness. He placed this desire in both of our family's hearts and He has seen it through to completion. Thank you for being so bold to speak truth to me, Miranda, when I was tempted to be discouraged. I pray that everyone can have friends like you guys!
Check out their baby girl at: http://themartinsandethiopia.blogspot.com/
In Christ, Laura
Friday, December 14, 2007
On a Lighter Note . . .
So . . . What is up with Christmas cards this year? I mean, it is already Dec. 14th and we have only TWO Christmas cards! Where are they? Our door is usually on its way to being covered at this point! Is it because we moved and nobody has our new address? Is everyone sending the cards to our previous address and we have to wait until they are forwarded here?! I miss the family pictures, the long news letters, the pretty cards . . . I want to run to the mailbox everyday when I hear the mailman pull up expecting AT LEAST 5 cards a day! Then, my children and I get to tear into them and I get to hear them ask "who is that?" at least a dozen times. Is everyone procrastinating this year? I EXPECT SOME CHRISTMAS CARDS PEOPLE!!
Oh, where is MINE you ask? Well . . . ummm . . . We have a REALLY good excuse. We are waiting until Jerome and Ruth get here to take a BIG family picture. You "probably" won't get it in time for Christmas. Okay, okay, you won't get it in time for Christmas. It probably won't go out until, ahem, the New Year, but it's worth the wait, right? You will still put it up on your door, or fridge, or wherever it is you post your cards and pictures, won't you?
I thought so.
So, if you already sent your Christmas card, you are off the hook. If you are in need of our new address, email me. If you FORGOT us, shame on you! How could you forget us when you are reading this blog! If you haven't sent them out yet . . . well . . . there is still time! We can't wait to hear what is going on with your family and to see how much your children have grown this past year.
In Christ, Laura
Oh, where is MINE you ask? Well . . . ummm . . . We have a REALLY good excuse. We are waiting until Jerome and Ruth get here to take a BIG family picture. You "probably" won't get it in time for Christmas. Okay, okay, you won't get it in time for Christmas. It probably won't go out until, ahem, the New Year, but it's worth the wait, right? You will still put it up on your door, or fridge, or wherever it is you post your cards and pictures, won't you?
I thought so.
So, if you already sent your Christmas card, you are off the hook. If you are in need of our new address, email me. If you FORGOT us, shame on you! How could you forget us when you are reading this blog! If you haven't sent them out yet . . . well . . . there is still time! We can't wait to hear what is going on with your family and to see how much your children have grown this past year.
In Christ, Laura
Final Scoop.
Okay. Here it is. The Final Scoop.
Jerome and Ruth are coming home on the 23rd of Decemeber. This is pending they get their visas Monday, which the consular confirmed over the phone to our Senator's office earlier today.
Sidnee is bring them home, along with the other set of children who were originally scheduled to come home PLUS a baby. This is a 19 year-old girl flying from Liberia to Brussels to New York with 5 kids!! She must be a brave woman. But, she works in the orphanage and knows the children really well. That says something about our children, doesn't it?
Our next prayer requests (we have lots of these lately, don't we?): For the visas, of course, but also for God to provide all we need financially--it is going to be a lot more to have them escorted home. He has faithfully provided all we needed in the past, He will do it again.
We are praying them home for Christmas . . .
In Christ, Laura
Jerome and Ruth are coming home on the 23rd of Decemeber. This is pending they get their visas Monday, which the consular confirmed over the phone to our Senator's office earlier today.
Sidnee is bring them home, along with the other set of children who were originally scheduled to come home PLUS a baby. This is a 19 year-old girl flying from Liberia to Brussels to New York with 5 kids!! She must be a brave woman. But, she works in the orphanage and knows the children really well. That says something about our children, doesn't it?
Our next prayer requests (we have lots of these lately, don't we?): For the visas, of course, but also for God to provide all we need financially--it is going to be a lot more to have them escorted home. He has faithfully provided all we needed in the past, He will do it again.
We are praying them home for Christmas . . .
In Christ, Laura
Visas
Jerome and Ruth will get their visas on Monday--one day too late.
However, there are still 2 chances for them to come home before Christmas--if there are tickets available. If not, they will be coming at the beginning of January. Please pray because they are going to try to change the escort's tickets so that she can bring our children home. I did find out, though, that the family of the children who were going to come with Sidnee have been waiting even longer than us for their kids. Pray for them-- they may be coming with Sidnee and our children may come with another family next weekend. We would not want to get our children first if there is a chance their children can come.
In Christ, Laura
However, there are still 2 chances for them to come home before Christmas--if there are tickets available. If not, they will be coming at the beginning of January. Please pray because they are going to try to change the escort's tickets so that she can bring our children home. I did find out, though, that the family of the children who were going to come with Sidnee have been waiting even longer than us for their kids. Pray for them-- they may be coming with Sidnee and our children may come with another family next weekend. We would not want to get our children first if there is a chance their children can come.
In Christ, Laura
Consular Says No.
I just received an email from the consular and she has said she will not process the visas today. She said she doesn't have time because she has 8 other cases. I emailed her back asking her to reconsider.
To come this far . . . for everything else to fall in to place . . . My mind is refusing to accept this right now.
Please pray for her to change her mind. We have until noon today. Pray that God would comfort our family.
In Christ, Laura
To come this far . . . for everything else to fall in to place . . . My mind is refusing to accept this right now.
Please pray for her to change her mind. We have until noon today. Pray that God would comfort our family.
In Christ, Laura
Thursday, December 13, 2007
An Answer to Prayer, A Prayer Request, and A Confession.
Wow. A lot has happened today.
Within the past few hours we have had a HUGE answer to prayer. After I posted last, I spoke with the travel agent who is arranging the flights for Jerome and Ruth. He said he would try to change the flights that were scheduled for the other children to our children. After a couple of hours, he called back and told me he had bad news. He said that the "system" would not allow him to change the tickets into our children's names. He had to cancel the tickets for the first set of children. Once he did that, he tried to book them for us. The computer would not let him do that. Once tickets are canceled they become available to those who are first on the waiting list. The travel agent, Ron, told me to start praying and he would call me in the morning to give me the news, but he said it didn't look good. Well I started to pray, feeling discouraged and about 3 minutes later the phone rang again and it was Ron. He asked me "Mrs. Mouro, were you praying?" I told them that I had been and he said that Jerome and Ruth got the tickets! There was no waiting list, and he couldn't explain it, but he was praising God!! He was shocked and he was in awe.
So, Jerome and Ruth are set to come home--leaving Monrovia, Liberia on Sunday morning (5 am) and arriving at JFK in NY at noon on Monday. Cameron is scheduled to go get them.
Here is our prayer request: We just received an email from a Liberian Acres of Hope staff and he wrote that the consular doesn't usually process visas on Fridays. That is the only thing we need to bring Jerome and Ruth home. That is the last hurdle. If she issues the visas tomorrow, they will be on the plane on Monday. If she doesn't they cannot come. Please pray for her heart to be softened toward our situation and that she would issue the visas tomorrow.
I am amazed at all God has done just within the past 2 days! Positive DNA results, an escort, and travel arrangements. He can accomplish His will and nothing will stop Him.
Okay. So this leads me to my confession. I have to confess that I was a mess today: I was doubtful, anxious, fearful, upset, angry. Yep. Instead of rejoicing about the DNA results, I was already moving onto the next step and trying to figure out a way to get Jerome and Ruth home. No, I did not want to leave the planning to God. I thought He might need a little "help" from me. So . . . I emailed my Acres of Hope group online asking if anyone could escort our children. I even emailed some individuals personally to ask them if they could bring our children home. Now this may seem harmless, but did God tell me to do this? No. What all this did was made me even more anxious and upset. I sat down to have my quiet time with God and cried and cried--and I am NOT a crier. That is when I read that verse in I John. I shared the verse in a previous post, but I didn't share what God spoke to me about that verse. The verse says: "If our hearts do not condemn us, we have confidence before God and receive from him anything we ask because we obey his commandments and do what pleases him." I was convicted at that moment that I was NOT doing what pleased God. God has called me to be a stay-at-home mom, but what was I doing? Was I engaging in the activities and duties that God called me to as a wife and mother that stays at home? No. I was sending out emails and such to try to "help" God do His job and I was neglecting what He wanted me to be doing--spending time with my children and attending to my household duties. I was not trusting Him, leaving the results to Him, believing by faith that He could and would work out all the details. I confessed my sin to God and He flooded my heart with peace. It was right after this that I found out all of our "good news" and how God had been at work all along and in ways that I could never have imagined!
So, here I am anxious about the visas tomorrow. I need to confess this, too! It is stressful, but hasn't God proved himself over and over in this adoption? AND if we don't get the visas tomorrow, then God has a different and better plan, doesn't he? Why do I always think my plans are better? I spent all that time today working on "my" plans. It was a waste of time.
Please pray for the consular to issue Jerome and Ruth's visas. More importantly, pray for ME--that my heart would rejoice in whatever God has planned.
In Christ,
Laura
Within the past few hours we have had a HUGE answer to prayer. After I posted last, I spoke with the travel agent who is arranging the flights for Jerome and Ruth. He said he would try to change the flights that were scheduled for the other children to our children. After a couple of hours, he called back and told me he had bad news. He said that the "system" would not allow him to change the tickets into our children's names. He had to cancel the tickets for the first set of children. Once he did that, he tried to book them for us. The computer would not let him do that. Once tickets are canceled they become available to those who are first on the waiting list. The travel agent, Ron, told me to start praying and he would call me in the morning to give me the news, but he said it didn't look good. Well I started to pray, feeling discouraged and about 3 minutes later the phone rang again and it was Ron. He asked me "Mrs. Mouro, were you praying?" I told them that I had been and he said that Jerome and Ruth got the tickets! There was no waiting list, and he couldn't explain it, but he was praising God!! He was shocked and he was in awe.
So, Jerome and Ruth are set to come home--leaving Monrovia, Liberia on Sunday morning (5 am) and arriving at JFK in NY at noon on Monday. Cameron is scheduled to go get them.
Here is our prayer request: We just received an email from a Liberian Acres of Hope staff and he wrote that the consular doesn't usually process visas on Fridays. That is the only thing we need to bring Jerome and Ruth home. That is the last hurdle. If she issues the visas tomorrow, they will be on the plane on Monday. If she doesn't they cannot come. Please pray for her heart to be softened toward our situation and that she would issue the visas tomorrow.
I am amazed at all God has done just within the past 2 days! Positive DNA results, an escort, and travel arrangements. He can accomplish His will and nothing will stop Him.
Okay. So this leads me to my confession. I have to confess that I was a mess today: I was doubtful, anxious, fearful, upset, angry. Yep. Instead of rejoicing about the DNA results, I was already moving onto the next step and trying to figure out a way to get Jerome and Ruth home. No, I did not want to leave the planning to God. I thought He might need a little "help" from me. So . . . I emailed my Acres of Hope group online asking if anyone could escort our children. I even emailed some individuals personally to ask them if they could bring our children home. Now this may seem harmless, but did God tell me to do this? No. What all this did was made me even more anxious and upset. I sat down to have my quiet time with God and cried and cried--and I am NOT a crier. That is when I read that verse in I John. I shared the verse in a previous post, but I didn't share what God spoke to me about that verse. The verse says: "If our hearts do not condemn us, we have confidence before God and receive from him anything we ask because we obey his commandments and do what pleases him." I was convicted at that moment that I was NOT doing what pleased God. God has called me to be a stay-at-home mom, but what was I doing? Was I engaging in the activities and duties that God called me to as a wife and mother that stays at home? No. I was sending out emails and such to try to "help" God do His job and I was neglecting what He wanted me to be doing--spending time with my children and attending to my household duties. I was not trusting Him, leaving the results to Him, believing by faith that He could and would work out all the details. I confessed my sin to God and He flooded my heart with peace. It was right after this that I found out all of our "good news" and how God had been at work all along and in ways that I could never have imagined!
So, here I am anxious about the visas tomorrow. I need to confess this, too! It is stressful, but hasn't God proved himself over and over in this adoption? AND if we don't get the visas tomorrow, then God has a different and better plan, doesn't he? Why do I always think my plans are better? I spent all that time today working on "my" plans. It was a waste of time.
Please pray for the consular to issue Jerome and Ruth's visas. More importantly, pray for ME--that my heart would rejoice in whatever God has planned.
In Christ,
Laura
THEY'RE COMING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
AHHHHH!
I JUST talked to our adoption agency and the children who were going to come with Sidnee (an American girl who works for Acres of Hope) are not going to be able to come home with her, SO . . . . . . . our children are coming!!!!!!!!!!!!!
BUT, here are the "hinges": #1. The consular HAS to issue their visas TOMORROW!
#2. The travel agency said they may have some difficulty changing the tickets from the other children to our children. I don't know why. He just said it may not work.
I will keep you posted! Thank you for your prayers. I can't believe that this is going to happen. I am going to meet my children in just a few days!
A few hours ago, I was praying and I was so discouraged. I thought that the obstacles were too many . . . my faith was so weak . . . I felt tired, distracted, overwhelmed. I felt spiritually attacked. Even Cameron was having a bad day. Both of us were feeling almost oppressed. I can't describe it. I was praying and reading the Word and God used this verse to speak peace to me: I John 3:21-23 "Dear friends, if our hearts do not condemn us, we have confidence before God and receive from him anything we ask, because we obey his commands and do what pleases him. And this is his command: to believe in the name of his Son, Jesus Christ, and to love one another as he commanded us."
Thank you for your prayers! God has used them to move mountains, not only the physical obstacles that stood in the way in this adoption, but ALSO the mountains in my own heart of doubt, fear, and pride.
One of us will travel to Orlando, Florida on Monday and be united with our children at 7 pm.
I will keep you posted!
In Christ, Laura
I JUST talked to our adoption agency and the children who were going to come with Sidnee (an American girl who works for Acres of Hope) are not going to be able to come home with her, SO . . . . . . . our children are coming!!!!!!!!!!!!!
BUT, here are the "hinges": #1. The consular HAS to issue their visas TOMORROW!
#2. The travel agency said they may have some difficulty changing the tickets from the other children to our children. I don't know why. He just said it may not work.
I will keep you posted! Thank you for your prayers. I can't believe that this is going to happen. I am going to meet my children in just a few days!
A few hours ago, I was praying and I was so discouraged. I thought that the obstacles were too many . . . my faith was so weak . . . I felt tired, distracted, overwhelmed. I felt spiritually attacked. Even Cameron was having a bad day. Both of us were feeling almost oppressed. I can't describe it. I was praying and reading the Word and God used this verse to speak peace to me: I John 3:21-23 "Dear friends, if our hearts do not condemn us, we have confidence before God and receive from him anything we ask, because we obey his commands and do what pleases him. And this is his command: to believe in the name of his Son, Jesus Christ, and to love one another as he commanded us."
Thank you for your prayers! God has used them to move mountains, not only the physical obstacles that stood in the way in this adoption, but ALSO the mountains in my own heart of doubt, fear, and pride.
One of us will travel to Orlando, Florida on Monday and be united with our children at 7 pm.
I will keep you posted!
In Christ, Laura
Consular Received DNA Results!!
We just received word that the DNA results were emailed to the consular today. This is a HUGE answer to prayer because we emailed the consular and told her to email the DNA lab to request the results and instead she emailed us to ask for them. I emailed her back and explained what needed to be done and did not hear back from her. I forwarded her email to the lab hoping that would be enough. The lab just emailed us and said they sent the DNA results to her. I am not sure whether she did end up emailing the lab or if our email was enough, but PRAISE GOD, one more step is done.
That leaves just tomorrow for her to issue the visas for Jerome and Ruth.
However, I was in touch with the travel agent today and there are NO seats on the flights coming over this weekend. We found a family that is willing to bring our kids. The husband in the family and his 3 daughters are bringing home their 4 adopted Liberian children. They said they would be more than happy to bring Jerome and Ruth, but there are no seats.
Please pray that 2 seats would open up. What is one more obstacle to God?
We will keep you posted! Cameron and I really need you to pray for us and our faith. This adoption journey has been long and God has sustained us, but we are weary. We are ready to be done with the wait and enjoy our children.
In Christ, Laura
That leaves just tomorrow for her to issue the visas for Jerome and Ruth.
However, I was in touch with the travel agent today and there are NO seats on the flights coming over this weekend. We found a family that is willing to bring our kids. The husband in the family and his 3 daughters are bringing home their 4 adopted Liberian children. They said they would be more than happy to bring Jerome and Ruth, but there are no seats.
Please pray that 2 seats would open up. What is one more obstacle to God?
We will keep you posted! Cameron and I really need you to pray for us and our faith. This adoption journey has been long and God has sustained us, but we are weary. We are ready to be done with the wait and enjoy our children.
In Christ, Laura
It Would Take a Miracle
It is going to take a miracle for the children to be able to come home this weekend because the flights from Brussels to the U.S. are all booked for holiday travel. Even if someone is willing to bring them here and we do already have their tickets, they will not be able to come due to lack of seats. It is looking like we may have to wait until January. We are going to check into this today, so pray for availability of seats for Jerome and Ruth. God can overcome any obstacle!
In Christ, Laura
In Christ, Laura
Wednesday, December 12, 2007
Here is What to Pray Now!
If Jerome and Ruth are going to come this weekend, it will only be by God. Cameron has to email the consular and she has to email the genetic lab her secure email address so that they can send the results to her. Once she receives the results, she has to issue Jerome and Ruth's visas. Then, a staff person from Acres of Hope has to go in to get the visas. Then, we have to find someone to escort them home. There is a girl from AoH who is coming home this weekend and would be an option for an escort. However, she may already be escorting another family's children. If this is the case, Jerome and Ruth may not be able to be escorted until January. We don't want to wait that long.
However, at least we know that THEY ARE COMING!! FOR SURE. There is no more uncertainty. Now, it is just a matter of getting them here. Everything has been processed and they are our children.
God has taught us so much during this process, but that is for another blog.
However, at least we know that THEY ARE COMING!! FOR SURE. There is no more uncertainty. Now, it is just a matter of getting them here. Everything has been processed and they are our children.
God has taught us so much during this process, but that is for another blog.
And the Verdict is . . .
POSITIVE!! The Mothers were telling the Truth!! Our children are coming home. Possibly this Sunday!
PRAISE GOD!!
Pray that we work out all these minor details to get them home this weekend.
In CHRIST,
Laura
PRAISE GOD!!
Pray that we work out all these minor details to get them home this weekend.
In CHRIST,
Laura
Tuesday, December 11, 2007
Anxious
I am sitting here, enjoying a muffin while the children are taking a break from school and playing outside, and I am thinking about tomorrow. I am anxious, nervous and excited. Tomorrow we find out if Jerome and Ruth are coming home in time for Christmas or if we will have to hunt down the true birthmothers and start the DNA process all over again. I know that God is in control . . . I am meditating on Philippians 4:6,7: "Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus".
God's peace will guard my heart--my emotions, and my mind--my thoughts, from sin, from wrong-thinking, from anxiety and doubt. This verse also tells me to present my request with thanksgiving, knowing that God will answer my prayer in the way that is best for us, and for His glory. So, we can't lose, can we? No matter what happens tomorrow, it is for our best, for the kid's best. We may not THINK it is the best, but it is, we have to trust that it is. Only God's word can produce that kind of faith and trust in me. Only God's word can change my anxiety into peace.
Pray with us today for a miracle tomorrow. Pray that nothing would go wrong in the processing of the tests. Pray that our children would come home soon. Cameron told me last night that he misses them so much. They way Katria laughs reminds him of Ruthie. All of Jonas' boy toys remind us that there will soon be another boy in this home--that Jonas will soon have someone with whom to play. Having Cameron's parents here for 5 days took my mind off of the wait. I think today and tomorrow are going to be long . . .
Please pray that God would prepare Cameron and me to receive whatever news is reported tomorrow.
In Christ, Laura
God's peace will guard my heart--my emotions, and my mind--my thoughts, from sin, from wrong-thinking, from anxiety and doubt. This verse also tells me to present my request with thanksgiving, knowing that God will answer my prayer in the way that is best for us, and for His glory. So, we can't lose, can we? No matter what happens tomorrow, it is for our best, for the kid's best. We may not THINK it is the best, but it is, we have to trust that it is. Only God's word can produce that kind of faith and trust in me. Only God's word can change my anxiety into peace.
Pray with us today for a miracle tomorrow. Pray that nothing would go wrong in the processing of the tests. Pray that our children would come home soon. Cameron told me last night that he misses them so much. They way Katria laughs reminds him of Ruthie. All of Jonas' boy toys remind us that there will soon be another boy in this home--that Jonas will soon have someone with whom to play. Having Cameron's parents here for 5 days took my mind off of the wait. I think today and tomorrow are going to be long . . .
Please pray that God would prepare Cameron and me to receive whatever news is reported tomorrow.
In Christ, Laura
Monday, December 10, 2007
Monday
Today was a hard day. Cameron's parents left this morning and it is always so difficult to say goodbye. We had such a great time with them. It was so nice to share mealtimes together, watch them interact with their grandkids, and play games together after the kid's bedtime. I didn't beat either of them once in Scrabble!!
Cameron drove his parents to the airport while I stayed home and got the kids ready for Haven's 2 month check-up. As Cameron's car pulled away, Anna buried her head in my side and cried and cried. She asked me why we have to live so far away from our family. Visits with family are few and far between. Our family all live in Michigan, with the exception of my brother in Oregon, and both sets of our parents are still working full-time. It has been 6 months since we have seen Cameron's parents and we won't see them again until March when we travel up to Michigan. We haven't seen Cameron's brother and their wives since LAST Nov. and we haven't seen my brother and his wife in 2 years!
It is hard to live far from family, but we had a choice to return to Michigan when Cameron was done with residency. We decided to stay here.
Why did we decide this? Because of our church--First Baptist of Durham. We have not only grown to love the people of First Baptist, but WE have grown. We have seen more spiritual growth in ourselves during the past 4 years here than at any other time in our lives. We did not want to leave a place where we are thriving. We have been sharpened, strengthened, stretched and refined by the teaching, preaching and fellowship. We have been so encouraged at the overwhelming support of the body of Christ through 3 new babies and this adoption. When we pressed through the trial of Katria's meningitis, and near-death, we were carried by our church family. When we were alone for Thanksgiving or Easter or birthdays, we always had "family" here to celebrate with. Our experiences with this adoption have blown us away. We were warned when we began this adoption journey to expect our church to be unsupportive and people to be cynical. We have experienced the opposite--overwhelming support and love. We have experienced the ministry of the body of Christ and it has been amazing.
So, this is the main reason we decided to stay in North Carolina. We love our family, but we know that God has planted us here and we have established roots in the past 4 years. Everytime family visits, we question our decision. However, it only takes one afternoon of fellowship with someone from our church family or one of Dr. Davis' sermons to remind us that God wants us here and He has a purpose.
Well . . . I am not going to lie . . . 80 degree weather in December DOES have something to do with our decision, too! HA!
It is hard to see our children crying when their grandparents leave. It tears my heart out. When Cameron came home from work tonight, all of the children ran out to greet him yelling "Daddy! Daddy!" Elyse yelled "PaaaaPaaaa!", which is what the children call their grandpa. She thought he had returned with Cameron since the last time she saw him was when he was leaving with Cameron. When Cameron came up alone, she burst into tears saying: "I want papa!". This was harder than dealing with my own post-visit lonliness.
Today was also difficult because I took Haven to the doctor. I dread the weight-checks. You would think that by the 5th baby I would stop worrying. Our babies tend to be really small and gain weight SLLLLOOOOWWWLLLY. All of them. Haven is no exception. She is tiny. She is in the 25th percentile. She will probably drop to the 5th percentile as all the rest have. But, I still worry. I worry that something is wrong with my nursing. I wonder if I should give big bottles of formula. But, we did that with Katria when she wasn't gaining weight. I quit nursing and gave formula and you know what? She was the tiniest one of them all!!! Didn't make a bit of difference. However, I would just LOVE to have one of those butterball babies with all the fat rolls. I would love to brag that my 2 month old is in 6 month clothing and is busting out of the infant carseat already. It isn't going to happen. Not this baby. Maybe never. I was tiny, my babies are tiny and they all turn out fine.
So, Haven got weighed today and got 5 shots!! She has been really sleepy. All of the children are sleepy after 5 days of grandma and papa. And I am tired and sore. UGH! I decided to resume my regular workout for the first time post-baby and I am paying for it today. I can barely move. I know I should have eased into it, but since when do I ever do anything halfway??
Tomorrow, we jump back into our routine--homeschool and chores. I have a mountain of laundry to fold. I have a closet full of Christmas presents to wrap. But, routine is good. It orders our days and brings peace back to sad hearts that miss family.
Then . . . Wednesday is the BIG day! Look for a post on the results of the DNA test.
In Christ, Laura
Cameron drove his parents to the airport while I stayed home and got the kids ready for Haven's 2 month check-up. As Cameron's car pulled away, Anna buried her head in my side and cried and cried. She asked me why we have to live so far away from our family. Visits with family are few and far between. Our family all live in Michigan, with the exception of my brother in Oregon, and both sets of our parents are still working full-time. It has been 6 months since we have seen Cameron's parents and we won't see them again until March when we travel up to Michigan. We haven't seen Cameron's brother and their wives since LAST Nov. and we haven't seen my brother and his wife in 2 years!
It is hard to live far from family, but we had a choice to return to Michigan when Cameron was done with residency. We decided to stay here.
Why did we decide this? Because of our church--First Baptist of Durham. We have not only grown to love the people of First Baptist, but WE have grown. We have seen more spiritual growth in ourselves during the past 4 years here than at any other time in our lives. We did not want to leave a place where we are thriving. We have been sharpened, strengthened, stretched and refined by the teaching, preaching and fellowship. We have been so encouraged at the overwhelming support of the body of Christ through 3 new babies and this adoption. When we pressed through the trial of Katria's meningitis, and near-death, we were carried by our church family. When we were alone for Thanksgiving or Easter or birthdays, we always had "family" here to celebrate with. Our experiences with this adoption have blown us away. We were warned when we began this adoption journey to expect our church to be unsupportive and people to be cynical. We have experienced the opposite--overwhelming support and love. We have experienced the ministry of the body of Christ and it has been amazing.
So, this is the main reason we decided to stay in North Carolina. We love our family, but we know that God has planted us here and we have established roots in the past 4 years. Everytime family visits, we question our decision. However, it only takes one afternoon of fellowship with someone from our church family or one of Dr. Davis' sermons to remind us that God wants us here and He has a purpose.
Well . . . I am not going to lie . . . 80 degree weather in December DOES have something to do with our decision, too! HA!
It is hard to see our children crying when their grandparents leave. It tears my heart out. When Cameron came home from work tonight, all of the children ran out to greet him yelling "Daddy! Daddy!" Elyse yelled "PaaaaPaaaa!", which is what the children call their grandpa. She thought he had returned with Cameron since the last time she saw him was when he was leaving with Cameron. When Cameron came up alone, she burst into tears saying: "I want papa!". This was harder than dealing with my own post-visit lonliness.
Today was also difficult because I took Haven to the doctor. I dread the weight-checks. You would think that by the 5th baby I would stop worrying. Our babies tend to be really small and gain weight SLLLLOOOOWWWLLLY. All of them. Haven is no exception. She is tiny. She is in the 25th percentile. She will probably drop to the 5th percentile as all the rest have. But, I still worry. I worry that something is wrong with my nursing. I wonder if I should give big bottles of formula. But, we did that with Katria when she wasn't gaining weight. I quit nursing and gave formula and you know what? She was the tiniest one of them all!!! Didn't make a bit of difference. However, I would just LOVE to have one of those butterball babies with all the fat rolls. I would love to brag that my 2 month old is in 6 month clothing and is busting out of the infant carseat already. It isn't going to happen. Not this baby. Maybe never. I was tiny, my babies are tiny and they all turn out fine.
So, Haven got weighed today and got 5 shots!! She has been really sleepy. All of the children are sleepy after 5 days of grandma and papa. And I am tired and sore. UGH! I decided to resume my regular workout for the first time post-baby and I am paying for it today. I can barely move. I know I should have eased into it, but since when do I ever do anything halfway??
Tomorrow, we jump back into our routine--homeschool and chores. I have a mountain of laundry to fold. I have a closet full of Christmas presents to wrap. But, routine is good. It orders our days and brings peace back to sad hearts that miss family.
Then . . . Wednesday is the BIG day! Look for a post on the results of the DNA test.
In Christ, Laura
DNA Test Delivered Today
About 10:30 this morning, the DNA test will be delivered. We are so anxious to find out the results of the test. I had a dream last night that I went to get the children. That would never happen, of course, with a 2 month-old baby, but it was so vivid nevertheless.
It has been so much fun to have Cameron's parents here. The children received their Christmas gifts--they got to pick them out this year. We went to a small mall in Chapel Hill on Sat. that has a great toy store. Cameron and I had a brunch to go to for his work in Southern Season, an up-scale grocery store in the same mall, so the whole crew came along. Cameron's parents took the children shopping for toys and to Chick-Fil-A for lunch and Cameron and I went to the brunch. The brunch was a cooking show and it was so much fun!! We sat and watched the chef make, and teach how to cook, different gourmet dishes and then we got to eat each course. It was wonderful and we both felt so pampered!
One funny thing that happened while Cameron's parents were here is that various household items have been broken. Some of these items were things Cameron and I have had since we got married. We have joked that we have been married so long that things are starting to wear out! It will be 9 years this May!!
For example, the day his parents arrived, I made dinner, put it in the crockpot, and loaded all 5 kiddos in the car to go to the airport. When we got home, the house smelled wonderful and everyone was hungry. We set the table and were just getting ready to sit down to eat when Cameron got home from work. I picked up the crockpot to take it to the dinner table, and as I did so, one of the handles snapped and the entire thing went crashing to the floor!! Thank God nobody was hurt. Our dinner was everywhere! As I surveyed the mess, I was so disappointed. We ended up ordering Chinese food.
The second item broke Sat. night. when I was using a nut-cracker to open a hazelnut. Now, I don't usually eat nuts whole, but Cameron's dad does and so we bought him a bag for when he came. As I attempted to crack open this nut, it flew out across the room and landed right in the baby's swing! (Thank God she wasn't in it.) Cameron's dad teased me and attempted to show me how to crack a nut the right way. As he did so, the nut cracked and so did the nut-cracker!
Yesterday, I cracked the lid to our butter dish and Cameron had to throw away our ironing board.
Praise God that although "things" from our wedding have gotten broken and worn out our marriage and our love hasn't. Relationships do take "maintenance", though, to stay intact and healthy. We often have to confess sin and ask for forgiveness. Sometimes, we have to confront others' sins. And, of course, relationships require our most precious resource: the investment of time.
The streak of broken household items has also been a reminder of how temporary our lives are here. Nothing in this world is permanent. In our house, the only thing that is eternal is our souls, and the souls of our children. My prayer is that I will invest in these eternal souls and not the temporary trappings--my house, my yard, my hobbies.
It blows me away how people think we have "too many" children! How can this be? This is the greatest investment, the best time spent on earth. One day, Cameron and I will be standing before God, and hopefully all of the children God has given us will be with us, praising Him for eternity. It won't matter all the months I was pregnant, how many years I nursed, how many sleepless nights, what we could have spent our money or time on if we didn't have them (i.e. vacations). Why would I want anything else than the best investment for my life? This is another reason why Cameron and I have chosen to adopt. We are investors. We ALL are really. We can invest in this world, or in eternity. We all know which is the wisest investment intellectually, but we don't all make the wisest choices with our time and money because it isn't the easiest. It is difficult to delay gratification--to say no to the self and spend time doing ministry or giving money. It is often hard for me to leave a mess and go play with my kids.
The Bible says that where your treasure is, there your heart will be. Where is your heart? What is your treasure? Is it God's kingdom? Do you have treasure stored up in heaven or are you squandering your inheritance now like the Prodigal Son? I have to remind myself of this frequently!
When you see a family with many children, try not to think to yourself how "lucky" you are not to have that headache or think that you are glad you are not "called" to that. Is it really a "calling" more than a choice one has made of where to make an investment? These families are "rich"! They are blessed! I stand in awe of large families (bigger than ours) and consider what a rich heritage they have. What a legacy they will leave behind! What an army for our God!
May we all aspire to invest in these souls and store up such treasure in heaven! Aren't the eternal souls of our children also treasures that will one day be in heaven with us? May we all view these families as wise investors and not gluttons for punishment. May ALL our children be viewed as a blessing. May we all also invest in eternity today in whatever opportunities God blesses us with--wiping noses and spills, homeschooling or (men) working to support the little (BIG) investments of eternity!
In Christ, Laura
It has been so much fun to have Cameron's parents here. The children received their Christmas gifts--they got to pick them out this year. We went to a small mall in Chapel Hill on Sat. that has a great toy store. Cameron and I had a brunch to go to for his work in Southern Season, an up-scale grocery store in the same mall, so the whole crew came along. Cameron's parents took the children shopping for toys and to Chick-Fil-A for lunch and Cameron and I went to the brunch. The brunch was a cooking show and it was so much fun!! We sat and watched the chef make, and teach how to cook, different gourmet dishes and then we got to eat each course. It was wonderful and we both felt so pampered!
One funny thing that happened while Cameron's parents were here is that various household items have been broken. Some of these items were things Cameron and I have had since we got married. We have joked that we have been married so long that things are starting to wear out! It will be 9 years this May!!
For example, the day his parents arrived, I made dinner, put it in the crockpot, and loaded all 5 kiddos in the car to go to the airport. When we got home, the house smelled wonderful and everyone was hungry. We set the table and were just getting ready to sit down to eat when Cameron got home from work. I picked up the crockpot to take it to the dinner table, and as I did so, one of the handles snapped and the entire thing went crashing to the floor!! Thank God nobody was hurt. Our dinner was everywhere! As I surveyed the mess, I was so disappointed. We ended up ordering Chinese food.
The second item broke Sat. night. when I was using a nut-cracker to open a hazelnut. Now, I don't usually eat nuts whole, but Cameron's dad does and so we bought him a bag for when he came. As I attempted to crack open this nut, it flew out across the room and landed right in the baby's swing! (Thank God she wasn't in it.) Cameron's dad teased me and attempted to show me how to crack a nut the right way. As he did so, the nut cracked and so did the nut-cracker!
Yesterday, I cracked the lid to our butter dish and Cameron had to throw away our ironing board.
Praise God that although "things" from our wedding have gotten broken and worn out our marriage and our love hasn't. Relationships do take "maintenance", though, to stay intact and healthy. We often have to confess sin and ask for forgiveness. Sometimes, we have to confront others' sins. And, of course, relationships require our most precious resource: the investment of time.
The streak of broken household items has also been a reminder of how temporary our lives are here. Nothing in this world is permanent. In our house, the only thing that is eternal is our souls, and the souls of our children. My prayer is that I will invest in these eternal souls and not the temporary trappings--my house, my yard, my hobbies.
It blows me away how people think we have "too many" children! How can this be? This is the greatest investment, the best time spent on earth. One day, Cameron and I will be standing before God, and hopefully all of the children God has given us will be with us, praising Him for eternity. It won't matter all the months I was pregnant, how many years I nursed, how many sleepless nights, what we could have spent our money or time on if we didn't have them (i.e. vacations). Why would I want anything else than the best investment for my life? This is another reason why Cameron and I have chosen to adopt. We are investors. We ALL are really. We can invest in this world, or in eternity. We all know which is the wisest investment intellectually, but we don't all make the wisest choices with our time and money because it isn't the easiest. It is difficult to delay gratification--to say no to the self and spend time doing ministry or giving money. It is often hard for me to leave a mess and go play with my kids.
The Bible says that where your treasure is, there your heart will be. Where is your heart? What is your treasure? Is it God's kingdom? Do you have treasure stored up in heaven or are you squandering your inheritance now like the Prodigal Son? I have to remind myself of this frequently!
When you see a family with many children, try not to think to yourself how "lucky" you are not to have that headache or think that you are glad you are not "called" to that. Is it really a "calling" more than a choice one has made of where to make an investment? These families are "rich"! They are blessed! I stand in awe of large families (bigger than ours) and consider what a rich heritage they have. What a legacy they will leave behind! What an army for our God!
May we all aspire to invest in these souls and store up such treasure in heaven! Aren't the eternal souls of our children also treasures that will one day be in heaven with us? May we all view these families as wise investors and not gluttons for punishment. May ALL our children be viewed as a blessing. May we all also invest in eternity today in whatever opportunities God blesses us with--wiping noses and spills, homeschooling or (men) working to support the little (BIG) investments of eternity!
In Christ, Laura
Friday, December 7, 2007
My Thoughts on Random Subjects
Since there will be no new information about the adoption until next week, I thought I would share my thoughts on some random subjects. For those of you who check in only to receive recent adoption updates feel free to ignore my ramblings . . . :)
Here is my view on television and why we don't allow our children to watch television. Yes, we are one of THOSE kinds of families, but we weren't always this way. We still do allow them to watch an *occasional* video, but VERY seldom.
I used to let the children watch half an hour to an hour a day of t.v.--this amounted to a 1/2 hour program after lunch and 1/2 an hour before dinner so that I could make dinner. No big deal.
However, and this is reason #1 why we don't allow them to watch t.v., I was convicted that I wasn't using t.v. appropriately. I wasn't watching it with them. I was using the t.v. in order to accomplish MY things without interruption. I was using it as a babysitter. Instead of training them to play quietly and leave mommy alone to take care of things, they would watch a video. Instead of training them to not interrupt when I was on the telephone, I would throw on a video. Instead of teaching them to help me make dinner or to play quietly at the dinner table, I would put on a video. Now, this wasn't everyday and all the time, but it was frequent enough that I was convicted that I was avoiding training them by placating them. I decided to cut out all t.v. and videos and train my children to obey me, to be quiet when I was on the phone, to play quietly when I was busy, or needed a shower.
The second reason came when I was spending time with God one day. I read the verse in John where Jesus said: "I have come that they may have life and have it to the full." I meditated on what that meant--"having life to the full." What does "full" mean? The picture that came to my mind was a person who has eaten a big meal--they are full. If one has eaten dinner and is full, he will have no room for dessert or snacks. In contrast, a person who snacks all day is full and has no room for dinner. How does this relate to t.v.? Well, when we allow our children to "snack" all day on the world, they will have no appetite for the things of God. They are "full" on the world and being full is a satisfied feeling. Their spirit is not being fed, but they do not notice it because they are full. These vidoes may not be "bad" in and of themselves, but what are they replacing? Something BETTER--God's Word.
In addition, our children watch these programs and start to emulate these characters. Companies target our children and sell all of the gizmos and gadgets that relate to these shows. I have seen it with my own children. They often act-out things they have seen or quote different lines. This stuff is not benign, it influences their minds because it is embedded there. Instead, shouldn't we be feeding them Scripture so they can quote the things of God not Barney?
What we feed on creates a certain appetite in us for certain things. For example, the more junk food you eat, the more you crave it. The healthier you eat, the more junk food no longer appeals to you. I liken much of what is on t.v. to junk food. The more you watch, the more you want. It may not be "bad", just like goldfish aren't necessarily "bad", but carrot sticks and apples are better and so are the things of God.
When we feed our children the things of God, they will become full and satisfied by God and will not have room for the things of this world. Their appetite for the things of this world diminishes and they have an appetite for the things of God.
So, I no longer allow my children to "snack" all day on the things of this world. We feed on God's word. I read the Bible to them at lunch-a chapter a day. They look forward to it. They remind me. They ask me questions. Cameron also reads to them at dinner--another chapter. We don't use kid's Bible books with the "souped up" stories, often with details that don't exist in the Bible. We read from the Word of God. Do my children complain? Never. They have an appetite for this because this is what they are fed.
Are my children "missing out"? I don't think so. What does t.v teach my children that I can't teach them myself? What does t.v. teach that books can't. I believe that this includes the computer, too.
I do not want my children to have to be "entertained" to learn things. Games are fun, but life is not a game. Learning is not always "fun". We are in an entertainment-saturated society. So many homeschool curriculums I come across promise that school will be so fun that children won't even know they are doing school. WHAT?! How does this benefit a child when they grow up and go to college and it is HARD and WORK and not fun? How does this train a child for a job that is often monotonous and is WORK? What is wrong with a child having to apply themselves to a subject and work?
So . . . this is why we don't watch t.v., and yes, this includes Cameron and I. We don't have cable and up until a few weeks ago, we didn't even have reception. A friend came over on Thanksgiving when Cameron was in Liberia to fix the t.v. so that my kids could watch the parade. What a mistake! Every few mintues Anna and Jonas ran up to tell me that the women were dressed immodestly or that the music was awful etc. etc. They did not enjoy it at all!
Someone once asked us what Cameron and I do if we don't watch t.v. We marveled at that question because we honestly don't have time! There is so much to do, even after our children are in bed. Sometimes, we just talk for hours and then realize that it is past our bedtime. Cameron often has work to do for his job and I am always in the middle of some book.
Maybe you have wanted to limit the t.v. or get rid of it, but think it will be too hard or the kids will complain too much. I would challenge you to ask yourself WHY you are letting your children watch it? Because it is easier than training them to not interrupt? Do you dread hearing them complain? Do you not think it is that bad? But, what better things could they be doing during this time? If your children are in school, how do they have time to watch t.v.? They have been away from you all day--don't you want to spend time with them?
Now, when we do watch a video, we watch it with our children, as a family activity. It is no longer a 1/2 distraction so that Mommy can get something done. Our children are better for it and so am I! :)
In Christ, Laura
Here is my view on television and why we don't allow our children to watch television. Yes, we are one of THOSE kinds of families, but we weren't always this way. We still do allow them to watch an *occasional* video, but VERY seldom.
I used to let the children watch half an hour to an hour a day of t.v.--this amounted to a 1/2 hour program after lunch and 1/2 an hour before dinner so that I could make dinner. No big deal.
However, and this is reason #1 why we don't allow them to watch t.v., I was convicted that I wasn't using t.v. appropriately. I wasn't watching it with them. I was using the t.v. in order to accomplish MY things without interruption. I was using it as a babysitter. Instead of training them to play quietly and leave mommy alone to take care of things, they would watch a video. Instead of training them to not interrupt when I was on the telephone, I would throw on a video. Instead of teaching them to help me make dinner or to play quietly at the dinner table, I would put on a video. Now, this wasn't everyday and all the time, but it was frequent enough that I was convicted that I was avoiding training them by placating them. I decided to cut out all t.v. and videos and train my children to obey me, to be quiet when I was on the phone, to play quietly when I was busy, or needed a shower.
The second reason came when I was spending time with God one day. I read the verse in John where Jesus said: "I have come that they may have life and have it to the full." I meditated on what that meant--"having life to the full." What does "full" mean? The picture that came to my mind was a person who has eaten a big meal--they are full. If one has eaten dinner and is full, he will have no room for dessert or snacks. In contrast, a person who snacks all day is full and has no room for dinner. How does this relate to t.v.? Well, when we allow our children to "snack" all day on the world, they will have no appetite for the things of God. They are "full" on the world and being full is a satisfied feeling. Their spirit is not being fed, but they do not notice it because they are full. These vidoes may not be "bad" in and of themselves, but what are they replacing? Something BETTER--God's Word.
In addition, our children watch these programs and start to emulate these characters. Companies target our children and sell all of the gizmos and gadgets that relate to these shows. I have seen it with my own children. They often act-out things they have seen or quote different lines. This stuff is not benign, it influences their minds because it is embedded there. Instead, shouldn't we be feeding them Scripture so they can quote the things of God not Barney?
What we feed on creates a certain appetite in us for certain things. For example, the more junk food you eat, the more you crave it. The healthier you eat, the more junk food no longer appeals to you. I liken much of what is on t.v. to junk food. The more you watch, the more you want. It may not be "bad", just like goldfish aren't necessarily "bad", but carrot sticks and apples are better and so are the things of God.
When we feed our children the things of God, they will become full and satisfied by God and will not have room for the things of this world. Their appetite for the things of this world diminishes and they have an appetite for the things of God.
So, I no longer allow my children to "snack" all day on the things of this world. We feed on God's word. I read the Bible to them at lunch-a chapter a day. They look forward to it. They remind me. They ask me questions. Cameron also reads to them at dinner--another chapter. We don't use kid's Bible books with the "souped up" stories, often with details that don't exist in the Bible. We read from the Word of God. Do my children complain? Never. They have an appetite for this because this is what they are fed.
Are my children "missing out"? I don't think so. What does t.v teach my children that I can't teach them myself? What does t.v. teach that books can't. I believe that this includes the computer, too.
I do not want my children to have to be "entertained" to learn things. Games are fun, but life is not a game. Learning is not always "fun". We are in an entertainment-saturated society. So many homeschool curriculums I come across promise that school will be so fun that children won't even know they are doing school. WHAT?! How does this benefit a child when they grow up and go to college and it is HARD and WORK and not fun? How does this train a child for a job that is often monotonous and is WORK? What is wrong with a child having to apply themselves to a subject and work?
So . . . this is why we don't watch t.v., and yes, this includes Cameron and I. We don't have cable and up until a few weeks ago, we didn't even have reception. A friend came over on Thanksgiving when Cameron was in Liberia to fix the t.v. so that my kids could watch the parade. What a mistake! Every few mintues Anna and Jonas ran up to tell me that the women were dressed immodestly or that the music was awful etc. etc. They did not enjoy it at all!
Someone once asked us what Cameron and I do if we don't watch t.v. We marveled at that question because we honestly don't have time! There is so much to do, even after our children are in bed. Sometimes, we just talk for hours and then realize that it is past our bedtime. Cameron often has work to do for his job and I am always in the middle of some book.
Maybe you have wanted to limit the t.v. or get rid of it, but think it will be too hard or the kids will complain too much. I would challenge you to ask yourself WHY you are letting your children watch it? Because it is easier than training them to not interrupt? Do you dread hearing them complain? Do you not think it is that bad? But, what better things could they be doing during this time? If your children are in school, how do they have time to watch t.v.? They have been away from you all day--don't you want to spend time with them?
Now, when we do watch a video, we watch it with our children, as a family activity. It is no longer a 1/2 distraction so that Mommy can get something done. Our children are better for it and so am I! :)
In Christ, Laura
DNA Results Expected
Cameron spoke with the lab yesterday and the man he spoke with said that we will receive the results before 2:30 on Wednesday. We also found out that they will be able to email the results to the consular. She will receive the results on Thursday, due to the time difference. Maybe the children will receive their visas next Friday??
Please pray that the results of the DNA test are such that our children would be able to come home.
In Christ, Laura
Please pray that the results of the DNA test are such that our children would be able to come home.
In Christ, Laura
Wednesday, December 5, 2007
More Info. on the DNA Kit and My Thoughts on Adoption
The DNA test is scheduled to arrive at the lab on December 10th at 10:30 am. We should have the results by Wednesday. Once we know, they are free to come home!
Lord, I pray that our children would be home for Christmas.
I remember last year, after the children had opened up their presents and were happily playing, I surveyed the mess of wrapping paper and boxes and imagined what life would look like one year from then. Would we have our children by Christmas the next year? I anticipated that we would. I imagined that there would be 2 more children excitedly ripping off wrapping paper to find new treasures inside. I pictured them playing with new toys, new siblings, safe in a new house, a new family. It has been a long journey, but I wouldn't trade it for a shorter, easier journey.
Maybe my "dream" won't come true. Maybe they won't be home for Christmas. Maybe they will be home and they won't be "grateful" for a new family. Maybe they will be sad, missing Liberia, missing the orphanage and the children and their familiar caregivers. Maybe they will cry, pout, throw temper-tantrums, grieve, lash out at us in anger . . . We don't know what to expect. Yes, Cameron did have an amazing 3 days with them during which they were obedient, kind, sharing, loving, affectionate and tender-hearted. But, they were in their own environment, one-on-one with an adult, attention all to themselves. They got special treats and presents. It is possible that the "honeymoon" will be over when they come and are surrounded by a new family that looks nothing like them and in a country that not only looks nothing like Libera, but is COLD! How will I love them then? What if my dream of the "perfect Christmas" comes crashing down and is shattered in the midst of temper-tantrums? What if my own kids want us to take these children back where they came from when their own ideas of having a new brother and sister doesn't materialize?
HOWEVER, this is NOT why we are adopting--to rescue a child so that they can gaze up at us with loving eyes and say "thank you". Yes, that would be amazing, but adoption is about God. It is about caring for the widows and orphans, which God commanded. Now that looks different for each family, for us it means adoption. Adoption also reveals God's heart toward us--He chose us and loved us while we were yet sinners and he adopted us, not because of anything we had done, not because we deserved, but because of His love, His grace for His glory. He called us, objects of wrath, his own, his children. He accepted us into His family. So, we (Cameron and I) are adopting children not our own into our family. No, we are not playing the role of God, but adoption is a reflection of the gospel--it is a visible representation of redemption. It is beautiful.
And, it is going to be hard. There are going to be days when we wonder why we did this. We have already had those days. I am going to have days when I want to pull out my hair. It is easy to love a child who is loveable. How do you love a child who is not only acting unloveable, but isn't even your own child and doesn't even look like you? How? By God's grace--through Jesus Christ, because of His death on the cross and His resurrection. Because I am free from sin and I am a new creature and God's Spirit lives in me and produces the fruit of the Spirit in me. Love, Joy, Peace, Patience, Kindness, Goodness, Faithfulness, Gentleness and Self-control. God will give us the love with which to love them. And, during those times when I question why we did this, when I doubt, I will remember that we did not adopt to "rescue a child" but because of God. That puts it all into perspective. He gets the glory--not our family. We are not more noble than others, we are not better parents, better Christians. We are not "martyrs", choosing a hard path to get glory for ourselves. We are just trying to follow Jesus wherever He leads, no matter how hard.
I have to remember that this is about God. These are his children. And even when it is hard, I need to trust His Sovereignty--that He ordained this, that He hand-picked these children for our family. God will NEVER start us on a journey of faith and then abandon us to handle it on our own.
Here is a quote that a good friend sent to me:
"Not only in good things does a christian have the dew of God's blessing, and find them very sweet to him, but in all the afflictions, all the evils that befall him, he can see love, and can enjoy the sweetness of love in his affliction as well as in his mercies. The truth is that the afflictions of God's people come from the same eternal love that Jesus Christ came from. Jerome said, 'He is a happy man who is beaten when the stroke is a stroke of love.' All God's strokes are strokes of love and mercy, all God's ways are mercy and truth, to those that fear him and love him (Ps 25:10). The ways of God, the ways of affliction, as well as the ways of prosperity, are mercy and love to him. Grace gives a man an eye, a piercing eye into the counsel of God, those eternal counsels of God for good to him, even in his afflictions; he can see the love of God in every affliction as well as in prosperity. Now this is a mystery to the carnal heart. They can see no such thing; perhaps they think God loves them when he prospers them and makes them rich, bu they think God loves them not when he afflicts them. That is a mystery, but grace instructs men in that mystery, grace enables men to see love in every frown of God's face, and so come to recieve contentment." (pg.60, Burroughs in The Rare Jewel of Christian Contentment)
Isn't that amazing? Doesn't that encourage you? It encourages me that though this adoption may be hard, after the children come home and everything isn't "picture perfect", God is working and every trial is for our good. If these children hate us, does that mean the adoption was not meant to be? Does that mean that Cameron and I were naive and were in love with a "fantasy"? No, it means that God isn't done with us; He is sanctifying us and He sends us trials, makes it difficult at times because He loves us.
Why do we, as Christians, often think that when life is going well, when everything is smooth-sailing and "easy" that we must be in the center of God's will? Living for God is often living in the "tension"--living in the trials and learning to depend on God and learning to rejoice because the treasure of God is worth more than anything on this earth. Trials can be as minor as traffic or as difficult as cancer. We, as Christians, and I am speaking of myself here, too, want an easy life. We want God's blessings, but when will we accept that trials ARE blessings! May God change my perspective. We as Christians are afraid to take leaps of faith for God. Don't be afraid of the future! Don't be afraid of the "what if's". How many of those fears really ever materialize and can't God get you through that, too? Can't God use 2 children from Africa who, God forbid, may have "reactive attachment disorder" to draw us nearer to Him? Can't that be His good and pleasing will?
So . . . after our dream comes true and the kids are home and you see that it IS hard for us . . . Pray for us! Rejoice with us even in that trial. Thank God that He is not done with us and we will come out on the other side of the trial "refined", purer. Pray that we will become more Christ-like and we will love our new children even when they are "unloveable" because God loved us when we were "unloveable" but he still died for us. And we still reject Him and he accepts us when we run back to Him again and again. I need to lay down my life and be willing to die for these children even if they never love me back.
In Christ, Laura
Lord, I pray that our children would be home for Christmas.
I remember last year, after the children had opened up their presents and were happily playing, I surveyed the mess of wrapping paper and boxes and imagined what life would look like one year from then. Would we have our children by Christmas the next year? I anticipated that we would. I imagined that there would be 2 more children excitedly ripping off wrapping paper to find new treasures inside. I pictured them playing with new toys, new siblings, safe in a new house, a new family. It has been a long journey, but I wouldn't trade it for a shorter, easier journey.
Maybe my "dream" won't come true. Maybe they won't be home for Christmas. Maybe they will be home and they won't be "grateful" for a new family. Maybe they will be sad, missing Liberia, missing the orphanage and the children and their familiar caregivers. Maybe they will cry, pout, throw temper-tantrums, grieve, lash out at us in anger . . . We don't know what to expect. Yes, Cameron did have an amazing 3 days with them during which they were obedient, kind, sharing, loving, affectionate and tender-hearted. But, they were in their own environment, one-on-one with an adult, attention all to themselves. They got special treats and presents. It is possible that the "honeymoon" will be over when they come and are surrounded by a new family that looks nothing like them and in a country that not only looks nothing like Libera, but is COLD! How will I love them then? What if my dream of the "perfect Christmas" comes crashing down and is shattered in the midst of temper-tantrums? What if my own kids want us to take these children back where they came from when their own ideas of having a new brother and sister doesn't materialize?
HOWEVER, this is NOT why we are adopting--to rescue a child so that they can gaze up at us with loving eyes and say "thank you". Yes, that would be amazing, but adoption is about God. It is about caring for the widows and orphans, which God commanded. Now that looks different for each family, for us it means adoption. Adoption also reveals God's heart toward us--He chose us and loved us while we were yet sinners and he adopted us, not because of anything we had done, not because we deserved, but because of His love, His grace for His glory. He called us, objects of wrath, his own, his children. He accepted us into His family. So, we (Cameron and I) are adopting children not our own into our family. No, we are not playing the role of God, but adoption is a reflection of the gospel--it is a visible representation of redemption. It is beautiful.
And, it is going to be hard. There are going to be days when we wonder why we did this. We have already had those days. I am going to have days when I want to pull out my hair. It is easy to love a child who is loveable. How do you love a child who is not only acting unloveable, but isn't even your own child and doesn't even look like you? How? By God's grace--through Jesus Christ, because of His death on the cross and His resurrection. Because I am free from sin and I am a new creature and God's Spirit lives in me and produces the fruit of the Spirit in me. Love, Joy, Peace, Patience, Kindness, Goodness, Faithfulness, Gentleness and Self-control. God will give us the love with which to love them. And, during those times when I question why we did this, when I doubt, I will remember that we did not adopt to "rescue a child" but because of God. That puts it all into perspective. He gets the glory--not our family. We are not more noble than others, we are not better parents, better Christians. We are not "martyrs", choosing a hard path to get glory for ourselves. We are just trying to follow Jesus wherever He leads, no matter how hard.
I have to remember that this is about God. These are his children. And even when it is hard, I need to trust His Sovereignty--that He ordained this, that He hand-picked these children for our family. God will NEVER start us on a journey of faith and then abandon us to handle it on our own.
Here is a quote that a good friend sent to me:
"Not only in good things does a christian have the dew of God's blessing, and find them very sweet to him, but in all the afflictions, all the evils that befall him, he can see love, and can enjoy the sweetness of love in his affliction as well as in his mercies. The truth is that the afflictions of God's people come from the same eternal love that Jesus Christ came from. Jerome said, 'He is a happy man who is beaten when the stroke is a stroke of love.' All God's strokes are strokes of love and mercy, all God's ways are mercy and truth, to those that fear him and love him (Ps 25:10). The ways of God, the ways of affliction, as well as the ways of prosperity, are mercy and love to him. Grace gives a man an eye, a piercing eye into the counsel of God, those eternal counsels of God for good to him, even in his afflictions; he can see the love of God in every affliction as well as in prosperity. Now this is a mystery to the carnal heart. They can see no such thing; perhaps they think God loves them when he prospers them and makes them rich, bu they think God loves them not when he afflicts them. That is a mystery, but grace instructs men in that mystery, grace enables men to see love in every frown of God's face, and so come to recieve contentment." (pg.60, Burroughs in The Rare Jewel of Christian Contentment)
Isn't that amazing? Doesn't that encourage you? It encourages me that though this adoption may be hard, after the children come home and everything isn't "picture perfect", God is working and every trial is for our good. If these children hate us, does that mean the adoption was not meant to be? Does that mean that Cameron and I were naive and were in love with a "fantasy"? No, it means that God isn't done with us; He is sanctifying us and He sends us trials, makes it difficult at times because He loves us.
Why do we, as Christians, often think that when life is going well, when everything is smooth-sailing and "easy" that we must be in the center of God's will? Living for God is often living in the "tension"--living in the trials and learning to depend on God and learning to rejoice because the treasure of God is worth more than anything on this earth. Trials can be as minor as traffic or as difficult as cancer. We, as Christians, and I am speaking of myself here, too, want an easy life. We want God's blessings, but when will we accept that trials ARE blessings! May God change my perspective. We as Christians are afraid to take leaps of faith for God. Don't be afraid of the future! Don't be afraid of the "what if's". How many of those fears really ever materialize and can't God get you through that, too? Can't God use 2 children from Africa who, God forbid, may have "reactive attachment disorder" to draw us nearer to Him? Can't that be His good and pleasing will?
So . . . after our dream comes true and the kids are home and you see that it IS hard for us . . . Pray for us! Rejoice with us even in that trial. Thank God that He is not done with us and we will come out on the other side of the trial "refined", purer. Pray that we will become more Christ-like and we will love our new children even when they are "unloveable" because God loved us when we were "unloveable" but he still died for us. And we still reject Him and he accepts us when we run back to Him again and again. I need to lay down my life and be willing to die for these children even if they never love me back.
In Christ, Laura
Tuesday, December 4, 2007
Update from Liberia
I just received an email from Acres of Hope in Liberia and was told that the DNA samples will be sent tomorrow!!! This is such good news! Cameron thinks the test should be in the States by next week. Then, it takes 2 days to process the results. Praise God! I hope DHL in Liberia functions like DHL in the States!
On another note, Jonas came down with the mysterious virus that the girls had this past weekend--the virus that causes a sore throat, headache and fever for 24 hours. He fell asleep at the dinner table without touching his food! This is unusual for the boy who tells me he is hungry all day. I put him to bed before 7 am and he is out! I hope Haven doesn't get sick, as well as Cameron's parents. It seems like everytime they come, they leave with some type of sickness. With 5 kids, by the time a virus travels through all of them a new virus has hit the first kids again. It seems like someone is always sick. Now as long as I don't come down with it, the household will still function!
Thank you for your prayers!
In Christ, Laura
On another note, Jonas came down with the mysterious virus that the girls had this past weekend--the virus that causes a sore throat, headache and fever for 24 hours. He fell asleep at the dinner table without touching his food! This is unusual for the boy who tells me he is hungry all day. I put him to bed before 7 am and he is out! I hope Haven doesn't get sick, as well as Cameron's parents. It seems like everytime they come, they leave with some type of sickness. With 5 kids, by the time a virus travels through all of them a new virus has hit the first kids again. It seems like someone is always sick. Now as long as I don't come down with it, the household will still function!
Thank you for your prayers!
In Christ, Laura
DNA Test
The DNA test was done today! Praise God! No word on if and when it will be shipped out. Pray that it gets shipped tomorrow on the plane that is leaving Liberia. Pray also for favorable results.
We are one step closer . . .
In Christ, Laura
We are one step closer . . .
In Christ, Laura
DNA Test Scheduled at 10 am Our Time Today--Please Pray!
I just received an email from our adoption agency in Liberia that the DNA test is scheduled at 3 pm Liberian time, which is 10 am our time. If you read this before then, please pray during this time for all to go well. He said both the kids and parents are all set--it is just up to the consular to keep the appointment. If you read this after that time, we would still appreciate your prayers :) We have learned so much through this adoption process how we are just so dependent on God. He initiated this adoption, He is going to see it through to completion.
Pray also that the test would be sent out immediately and not sit somewhere. We would like to get the results by next week.
We have bought Jerome and Ruth Christmas presents, believing in faith that they will be home for Christmas. What an amazing Christmas this would be! The kids and I have had so much fun picking out toys for them--trying to anticipate what they will like based on what we have heard of them.
We are busy today getting ready for Cameron's parents to come for a visit tomorrow. They will be here through this weekend. We are excited because Cameron's father is going to fly!! He had always said he would never fly here and he is actually going to get on a plane tomorrow!
Some of the kids have been battling a virus. Elyse has been wheezing and needed breathing treatments and a course of steroids. It is difficult whenever she or Jonas have to go on steroids, or I should say--they are difficult. Steroids changes their personality and moods. Yesterday, after Elyse pinched the baby (she usually kisses her ALL day!) I told her I didn't like the steroids because she wasn't nice when she was on them. She looked at me with a dead-pan face and said "I'm mean." She is such a little stinker!
I will post about the DNA test when I hear how it went.
Praying our children home,
Laura
Pray also that the test would be sent out immediately and not sit somewhere. We would like to get the results by next week.
We have bought Jerome and Ruth Christmas presents, believing in faith that they will be home for Christmas. What an amazing Christmas this would be! The kids and I have had so much fun picking out toys for them--trying to anticipate what they will like based on what we have heard of them.
We are busy today getting ready for Cameron's parents to come for a visit tomorrow. They will be here through this weekend. We are excited because Cameron's father is going to fly!! He had always said he would never fly here and he is actually going to get on a plane tomorrow!
Some of the kids have been battling a virus. Elyse has been wheezing and needed breathing treatments and a course of steroids. It is difficult whenever she or Jonas have to go on steroids, or I should say--they are difficult. Steroids changes their personality and moods. Yesterday, after Elyse pinched the baby (she usually kisses her ALL day!) I told her I didn't like the steroids because she wasn't nice when she was on them. She looked at me with a dead-pan face and said "I'm mean." She is such a little stinker!
I will post about the DNA test when I hear how it went.
Praying our children home,
Laura
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